Men, If You’re Doing This, It Will Push Your Wife Into Another Man’s Arms Every Time…

You can deeply love your wife…

To spend the rest of your life with her can be your greatest desire…

But, if you possess one certain characteristic, you can be assured that two things will happen:

1. Your wife will first check out emotionally
2. Your wife will then leave you for another partner (that she’s either already found or will find)

Would you like to know what this one characteristic is so you can avoid it? Yes?

Here it is… Wait… Maybe it’s better that you discover it for yourself in the following…

Do you frequently wonder what your wife’s true feelings are towards you?

Are you always asking her if she loves you?

And, if she does say that she loves you, do you often doubt that she really means it in her heart?

What about phone calls or letters that she receives? Is it really important to you to know who they are from and what was said?

Do you secretly question if your wife is really committed and true to you?

Are you one who likes lots of reassurance from your wife that everything in your marriage relationship is ok?

Maybe, you want constant confirmation from your wife that she’ll always be with you and will never leave you?

And, if something does go wrong in the marriage relationship, do you automatically start wondering if it’s over with and thinking that there’s no hope?

Stop! Have you already picked up on what the characteristic is?

Here it is in a word…

INSECURITY

And, the bad news is that insecurity never runs by itself…it always drags along its close cousins of CONTROLLING, NEGATIVITY, and SUSPICION.

The insecure man tries to “control” his wife – although he rarely realizes it – even as he interprets everything about her with “suspicion” and injects “negativity” into everything she does.

That’s why I can assert that an insecure man’s wife will eventually check out emotionally after which she will physically depart the marriage relationship.

It’s a fact…the insecure man IS losing his wife. The only question is how long it will be before she’s gone.

You see, a husband’s continual insecurity wears on his wife. It grates on her nerves. It emotionally drains her.

See, with all of life’s bombardments, one has to work at keeping themselves emotionally healthy. But, when you also have to be an “emotional support system” for another person, it quickly becomes too much…too draining.

At the start of the relationship, although a wife may find it irksome that her husband needs constant reassuring, she’ll go ahead and give it to him. But, she quickly reaches a state where she’s given out all of her reassurance and she has no reassurance left for herself.

Even worse, she’s not getting the reassurance from her husband that she craves… She’s always giving out reassurance but never getting anything back in return.

This wife quickly tires of having to constantly reassure an insecure husband. She tires of giving. She tires of trying.

On one hand, she DREAMS of being with a man who causes her to feel alive and exhilarated. On the other hand, she LIVES with a husband whose nagging insecurity leaves her feeling drained and exhausted.

And so, a wife who is married to an insecure man goes through a progression:

1. She starts to view her husband as UNATTRACTIVE. (And the husband starts complaining that his wife’s desire for sex is declining.)
2. She progresses to resenting her husband’s WEAKNESS. (And the husband becomes even more unhappy because his wife won’t hardly have sex at all now.)
3. Finally, she reaches the stage where she literally HATES her husband. (And the husband is really unhappy now because he and his wife virtually never have sex anymore.)

These three steps are the wife’s “checking out emotionally” phase that I referred to at the beginning.

And, once she’s completed this process of “checking out”, she WILL leave. She will leave as a matter of SELF-PRESERVATION – as a matter of protecting her sanity, dignity, and peace-of-mind.

Bottom line, it is a foolish man who expects his wife to understand, support, and hang around to be tormented by his insecurity.

Copyright 2008, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Men, Here’s One Reason Why Your Wife’s Sex-Drive Declined After Marriage…

After finally deciding to commit his life to one woman in marriage… After the “I do’s” are said… After the honeymoon is over… And, as married life begins…most men desire to be a nice, pleasant, pleasing, helpful, and accommodating husband.

And unfortunately, for many men, that’s when the trouble begins. In fact, it’s not unusual for it to be only a matter of a few weeks to a few months until a man begins to think that getting married was a HUGE mistake.

Here’s what I want you to realize, there’s a right way to be a good husband. And, there’s a wrong way to be a good husband.

Let’s explore…

Imagine a freshly-married Mr. and Mrs. Jones returning from their honeymoon… He goes back to his evening job (3 pm until 11 pm). And, she goes back to her day job (8 am until 5 pm).

Because he’s off during the day, Mrs. Jones “sweetly” asks Mr. Jones if he would mind doing some small chore or errand for her “since he’s off during the day.”

And, since Mr. Jones wants to be a “good” husband, he happily agrees to do the chore or errand.

But of course, there’s a lot that has to be done in the “running” of a home / house / marriage. And so of course, Mrs. Jones just keeps adding one thing after another to Mr. Jones’s list of chores and errands.

Before he knows it, Mr. Jones is doing most of the household chores. He’s cleaning house, washing dishes, doing the laundry, getting groceries, running all the errands…

And then, Mr. Jones goes to work.

Later, Mrs. Jones comes home from work. And, she’s tired from working all day. So, she sits down, watches her soaps that she recorded during the day or watches whatever evening sitcom she happens to like and then she goes to bed.

Afterwards, Mr. Jones returns home from his job – hoping to find Mrs. Jones feeling a bit intimate – only to find that she’s sound asleep or “not in the mood” or “too tired” or “I’ve got to get up early in the morning”.

And, before long, no matter what Mr. Jones does, no matter how far he goes out of his way, no matter what sacrifices or how many sacrifices he makes, no matter what help he offers or provides… IT’S NEVER ENOUGH!

And of course, it goes without saying that if anything goes wrong, is forgotten, or gets neglected, then by default it is ALWAYS Mr. Jones’s fault.

And the fights begin…

But then, they’ll make up and Mrs. Jones asks Mr. Jones for a cat because she just so loves cats and she PROMISES that she’ll take care of the cat – it will be HER responsibility…

And again, Mr. Jones wants to be a good husband and even though he doesn’t like cats, he agrees to help Mrs. Jones find the “perfect” cat…

$300 later, they’ve found that “purrr-fect” cat…

And a few days later, Mr. Jones is the only one taking care of the cat…in addition to everything else that he’s taking care of.

In wanting to be a “good” husband, Mr. Jones has ALLOWED himself to become responsible for EVERYTHING while Mrs. Jones has got out of being responsible for ANYTHING around the house.

To Mr. Jones, this is a HUGE problem.

To Mrs. Jones, there is NO problem…everything is exactly the way she likes it and wants it.

Sadly, some men spend a life-time living like this…

Men, here is your WAKE-UP CALL – a woman is never attracted to a “push-over” man who responds and reacts to her every whim, request, or demand.

Or, more bluntly, a woman is never interested in sex with a “push-over” man. She’s too busy fantasizing about having sex with some strong, masculine man to be interested in having sex with her “weenie” husband.

Now, I’m not suggesting that men shouldn’t help out around the house or that men shouldn’t do household chores because they should…

In other words, the inverse of this story – where the woman gets saddled with all of the household responsibilities while the man accepts none of them – doesn’t work either.

Going back to our story… The fact is, Mr. Jones should do certain chores before he goes to work. And, Mrs. Jones should do certain chores when she get’s home after work.

In simple terms, household work must be split up in a way that is fair and equitable. If Mr. Jones wants to be a “good” husband, he should take the conversational lead and establish what is fair and equitable given their circumstances and arrangements.

If he had done this at the very beginning of the marriage, then it’s unlikely there would have ever been a problem.

But now… Now that Mrs. Jones expects him to be her “servant”, there is a problem…

It’s going to take time and calm-confrontation for Mr. Jones to “re-train” her and “re-set” her expectations of what her part in the marriage is.

For example, if Mrs. Jones fails to do her part of the chores when she comes home – those chores they’ve agreed in conversation that she would do, then Mr. Jones will IMMEDIATELY stop doing any chores or errands that pertain to Mrs. Jones – for sake of example, let’s say no longer doing any of her laundry.

Similarly, if Mrs. Jones chooses to criticize and pick apart something Mr. Jones has done, then Mr. Jones IMMEDIATELY stops doing that thing for her. Again, using the laundry example, if she doesn’t like something about how he does her laundry, then he immediately – without fuss or fanfare – stops doing any of her laundry.

It will be one less thing that Mr. Jones has to do and it won’t take Mrs. Jones very long to start “understanding” that she has to do her part and she has to do it in a PLEASANT way.

As another example, if Mrs. Jones fails to take responsibility for her “cat”, Mr. Jones can calmly, politely give her one warning reminder after which Mr. Jones simply gets rid of the cat.

Now, Mrs. Jones may “throw a fit” – maybe even a “huge fit” – but she’ll get the message loud and clear that there is zero-tolerance from her husband when she doesn’t “line up” and “carry” her part of the load.

And here’s the best part…

This NEW Mr. Jones is going to start feeling a whole lot better about himself…

And, Mrs. Jones is going to start feeling a whole lot more sexually attracted to this NEW man – the NEW Mr. Jones.

One last thing, some women are so used to getting everything their way that they will literally throw almost ANY kind of tantrum to get their way when they are resisted. A man needs to expect this so that he can deal with it in a calm way.

As an example, Mrs. Jones may go so far as to threaten Mr. Jones with divorce if he doesn’t let her get her way…

This is where many men crumble – especially when there are kids involved – and when he crumbles, Mrs. Jones then knows that she FULLY CONTROLS her husband – and her tyranny will not only continue, it will increase to even worse level.

When faced with a fit-throwing Mrs. Jones, Mr. Jones would be better served to calmly remind Mrs. Jones that:

• He loves her
• A marriage takes two people carrying their part of the load and working TOGETHER
• They have talked about and mutually agreed upon what part of the load was whose to carry
• He expects whoever is married to him to carry her part of the load just as he expects himself to carry his part of the load
• Mrs. Jones always has the prerogative to choose whether she wants to carry her part of the load WITH him or go somewhere else because she doesn’t want to carry her part of the load – and she should decide right now once and for all which way she wants it to be.

Almost always, Mrs. Jones will be shocked out of her selfish little game-playing. She’ll be AWAKENED to just how much she respects and admires her husband – and just how sexy and attractive he really is.

And, in that rare case where Mrs. Jones actually does follow through with her threat and leaves – well, fellow, she was going to leave anyway – it was just a matter of time. It’s to your advantage to get it over with so that you can start your life anew – with someone who ISN’T a selfish little brat.

Copyright 2008, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Men, Is This Secretly Destroying Your Marriage or Relationship?

There’s a certain thing that is destroying marriages and relationships the world over – right now. Perhaps, it’s silently working to tear down and destroy even your relationship…

I say silently because it’s hidden. No one ever sees it. It’s “covered up”. In fact, it’s covered so well that you’d think it didn’t exist…and yet, buried though it may be, it’s DRIVING power is persistently having a negative impact on far too many marriages and relationships.

It’s a fear – a very specific fear…it is…the fear that your spouse somehow, someway finds you inadequate – that your spouse secretly wants something you can’t give them but just doesn’t say anything about it to you – or, that your spouse is unfulfilled in you, but doesn’t want to tell you for fear of “hurting” you.

Baloney! Garbage! Rubbish! BS!

Friend, here’s one of the greatest secrets to success in a marriage or relationship that you can ever grasp…whatever level of inadequacy that other people perceive in you ORIGINATES in YOUR mind.

In other words, if you secretly fear that you are inadequate, then your spouse will subconsciously pick up on that vibration and subconsciously reach the conclusion that you are somehow, someway inadequate.

Conversely, if you maintain a genuine, congruent self-belief that you are fully able and capable of meeting your spouses every need – physically and emotionally – then your spouse will subconsciously pick up on that vibration and WILL ACCEPT IT AS TRUE!

Regardless of your opinion about them, adult films offer us a very telling demonstration of what I’m talking about here… There are certain adult stars – male and female – who are endowed with (or who have surgically created) the finest specimen’s of the human body.

Moreover, these adult stars have learned how to groom and oil and position their bodies in just the right way while making sure the lights are set in only complimentary angles such that by the time the “mere normal person” sees them on film, he or she can easily feel inferior, intimidated, and inadequate in comparison to these stars.

And yet, after watching several of these types of films in a row, you quickly begin to realize that in spite of all these adult stars physical features, you are watching a passionless, meaningless…

…FREAK SHOW!

Sure, they act like they’re enjoying “over the top” passion ­– but, you can tell that it’s not real just as surely as you can tell when a toddler is telling you a false “story”.

But, if you were to dig around long enough (and I’m not suggesting that you do, I’m just saying if you did) you would eventually find a film where a flat-chested woman and a man with a less-than-average-sized member set aside all the pretending, faking, judging, and evaluating (both of themselves and the other person) and simply focused on confidently giving and receiving as much pleasure as they possibly could.

On the woman’s part, she let her SMALL breasts be a source of HUGE pleasure to both herself and to the man.

On the man’s part, he let his SMALL member be a source of GIGANTIC pleasure to both himself and to the woman.

The result? Absolutely amazing, truly red-hot sex!

Do you realize…and can you accept…that the physical size or shape of certain body parts – whether on you or on another person – can NEVER give the same level of pleasure as a person who has a full-out, confident mental INTENTION to both give and receive maximum pleasure – regardless of how idyllic or non-idyllic certain body parts are sized or shaped?

Did you fully grasp that last paragraph? I hope so because it contains a key secret to abolishing this hidden fear of inadequacy that so many people suffer from.

In my above illustration, it was both the woman and the man’s confident giving of their non-idyllic body parts – the surrendering of them – for the pleasure and enjoyment of both of them that created the real passion.

In thinking and believing that no matter what the size or shape, they could fully give and receive pleasure – they enjoyed exactly that.

And here’s the thing…this giving and surrendering is something that any couple – any man and woman – can do.

Let’s go a step further so you can really clear this up in your head and get things sorted out in a way that works for you…

It may be that your spouse has made statements or passing comments about certain physical sizes, shapes, or characteristics that you don’t possess. If that’s the case, here’s what you need to realize…

Your spouse may have PREFERENCES for certain OPTIONS that you don’t possess – just as you have preferences for certain options that your spouse may not possess.

Get this… There’s a HUGE difference between a PREFERENCE and a REQUIREMENT!

If it was a requirement, your spouse would have either laid that out at the beginning of the relationship or would have never even pursued a relationship with you in the first place.

A preference for a certain size, shape, color, or whatever is just that – a preference. And preferences are optional! If you don’t have it, well, no big deal, it was just optional anyway.

So, realizing this, just RELAX! Let go of all your fears of inadequacy.

What’s important…what you want to really pay attention to…what you want to focus on are those things that are NOT optional…those things that really are requirements – the giving and receiving of mutual love, respect, appreciation and regular intimacy.

Now, I want to go back and revisit a word I used previously – COMPARISON…

There has never been a game more designed for you to LOSE than the game of comparing one’s self to others.

It’s such a losing game because when a person compares and then self-judge’s themselves as somehow “less” than others, they WITHDRAW or WITHHOLD.

And, in the process of withdrawing and withholding, they block every chance of having the happiness and fulfillment in life they desire. They BLOCK THEMSELVES!

Every time!

Withdrawing and withholding has never served to make anyone happy – ever!

The fact is, there will ALWAYS be someone who has a better shape, size, or characteristic than you. There will ALWAYS be someone who has something you don’t have.

So what?

Who cares?

The way for YOU to stop losing and start winning – in every area of your life, especially in relationships – is to confidently step out, to be more forward, and to start giving of yourself – regardless!

Again, the fear of inadequacy is a SELF-ORIGINATING thought. The antidote is SELF-APPROVAL and SELF-ACCEPTANCE.

Don’t look for your worth in the external world. Don’t look to other people for approval.

Beating yourself up by comparing yourself to others makes for a hard, painful, unhappy life.

Withholding and withdrawing yourself because you wonder if your spouse views you as inadequate is a sure way to destroy any and all good that happens to remain in your relationship – that you haven’t already destroyed.

Realize this…you are an important, talented, and special person. Let that sink in because it’s TRUE. You are completely unique.

Some things you’re better at then others, some you’re not.

Big deal!

There’s no need for unnecessary comparison.

Just be the best YOU that you can be.

Sure, develop and grow in those areas where you can. But while you’re developing and growing, always, always, ALWAYS be giving of what you have RIGHT NOW so that you can enjoy life to the fullest RIGHT NOW.

And, in the occasional case where the other person continually chooses to reject what you’re offering and giving…THAT’S OK! It’s ok because that person is just clearing themselves out of the way so that another person – one who wants to appreciate and enjoy what you’re offering and giving – can come into your life.

Copyright 2008, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Did Your Wife Say, "You're Not Romantic Anymore"? Here's How to Defend Yourself...

Wives commonly complain of how their husbands have "lost" all sense of romance. They talk of how romantic he was before marriage and how he now doesn't have a romantic bone in his body.

And because romance is such a nebulous and ethereal concept, men often accept this accusation as being true. That leaves them struggling and wondering how to be more "romantic" in their marriage.

Well, I want to show you that the notion of a non-romantic husband is mostly a FALSE STEREOTYPE that husbands are unjustly saddled with.

First, let's go back the dating game. Anytime you see "successful" courting (as the old-timers call it), you see a guy AND a gal who are both working at attracting and being attracted. You see them pursuing and being pursued. And, you see them setting up sequences and scenarios where they can be "caught".

In other words, a successful courtship is a game where both parties are able to win a "catch" at frequent intervals. Of course, all of this "game playing" happens at a mostly unconscious level but it is nevertheless happening.

To cement this point in your mind, imagine yourself watching a lunch-room full of high-school kids. Notice how girls are play-hitting the guys - who turn it around and play-pinch the girls - and then the guys run away as the girls chase them - and then it turns around again and the guys are chasing the girls - and there's lot's of squealing and laughing as the game culminates in hugs or other forms of touching and petting.

So, as you can clearly see, the game of courtship is a continuous loop of give and take - of chasing and catching and then being chased and being caught. Of course, this game may get a bit more sophisticated as guys and gals get past their teenage years - but often not by much.

In contrast, anytime you see a one-sided courtship - meaning that one person is doing all the chasing and the other person never chases back and won't be caught - then you're seeing a relationship that can NEVER work. These kinds of relationships are often associated with the words "harassment" or even "stalker".

Now, let's move to the day after the wedding. At this point, there are a whole slew of responsibilities and obligations that were mostly non-existent prior to marriage. The big issue of course is money.

Prior to marriage, most young people work a job so they have spending money for playing. Usually, they don't have to worry about paying a mortgage or the myriad of smaller expenses that come with normal life. For many young people, their biggest obligation is something like a car payment.

But after getting married, now ALL of the responsibility for a rent or mortgage payment, all the car payments, all the taxes, all the groceries, all the EVERYTHING falls in the lap of the young couple. More often than not, the majority of this burden falls on the shoulders of the man.

And so, he turns his attention and energy towards addressing this money problem.

And then usually, along come children with all of their associated responsibility. And, more often than not, the majority of this burden falls on the shoulders of the woman.

And so, she devotes most of her attention and energy to the children.

But, while all of this attention and energy is on solving life's challenges, the man still wants sex and the woman still wants romance. Unfortunately, because of all the energy put into addressing life's problems, neither the man nor the woman wants to put any energy into getting the sex or the romance - they just want it to be there.

And therein lays the problem!

Specifically, the man isn't "chasing" like he was prior to marriage because he's focused on money and the woman doesn't want to get "caught" because she's tired from her own work and from dealing with the kids.

But, again, society generally lays the blame on the husband for no longer being romantic.

Well, as they say in the country, that's a bunch of HOGWASH!

It's hog-wash because the very MOMENT you put that very same "non-romantic" husband into a situation where a different woman is flirting with him - meaning she's chasing him and wanting him to catch her - is the very moment you will INSTANTANEOUSLY HAVE A MAN WHO IS AN ABSOLUTE ROMANTIC!

Do you see that?

So, it's not that the man lost his ability to be romantic. It's the fact that he lost a companion who wants to be caught.

CORRECTION! To state more accurately what I said a few paragraphs back, the man's not chasing his wife - not because he's so focused on money - but because she doesn't want to get caught.

And when a man has a partner who doesn't want to be caught, HE HAS NO POSSIBLE WAY THAT HE CAN BE ROMANTIC! He has nothing to work with. The platform upon which romance can happen has been totally blown away.

Now that we have this understanding, we can clearly see the fallacy of a woman wanting to enjoy feelings of romance while avoiding getting caught.

It's a fallacy because romance is framed in and based on sexual tension and release. To desire romance that is stripped of the sexual element is a totally NONSENSICAL CONCEPT.

So, what's the solution?

It's simple.

Both the man AND the woman must take personal responsibility for supporting and encouraging both the chasing and the getting caught.

In spite of all the challenges of life, both the man and the woman must take personal responsibility for PROMOTING the game of courtship within their marriage.

For when they BOTH play the chasing and catching game, their marriage will be FULL OF ROMANCE!

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

You Don't Really Want An Over-Sized Penis And Here's Why...

There are people who are abnormal.

For example, the tallest man in the world towers above the average man while the shortest man in the world must look up to the average man - even one who is sitting down.

While both the tallest and the shortest man are human beings who deserve all the goodness that every human being deserves, when compared to the average man's height, they're abnormal.

And, given the problems and difficulties faced by these men with their height abnormalities, the average man would rather just be average height.

In like fashion, there are a tiny percentage of men who have abnormally large penises. Just as before, because of their abnormality, they face problems and difficulties that most men would rather not have. Let's see why...

Because of the business I'm in, I've made acquaintance with several men who possessed abnormally large penises.

There was a common thread in every single one of them...

They all had significant health problems - although the specific health problem seemed to be different for each man.

Apparently, the genetic "malfunction" that gave them an abnormally large penis size also gave them undesirable health problems.

One of them - a man who worked with me for several months - will serve as a good example.

On the outside, he looked just like a normal man. His height, hands, feet, and overall build were just like those of a normal man.

But, underneath, there were two things that were definitely not normal.

One, his penis was twice the size of an average male - a full 12+ inches when erect. He liked to talk and brag about it and even show it to anyone who would look...when he wasn't dealing with #2 that is...

Two, he had major problems with seizures and spasms.

(NOTE: In no way am I insinuating that seizures and spasms are linked to penis size. I'm simply stating the health problems this particular man dealt with.)

There was another problem too...

It only took a few minutes for women to discover that they weren't at all interested in this man - in fact, many appeared to be quite repulsed by him. This was because it quickly became apparent to them that this man was all about his penis.

And, a normal woman wants far more from a man than just a mere penis.

In other words, a multi-dimensional male is far more interesting and appealing to a normal female than is a one-dimensional penis - and therefore, a female is far more interested in having a relationship with a normal man than she is with an abnormal penis.

In all the cases of men I've known with abnormally large penises, they admitted it was nice to be the envy of the other guys when they were in a locker-room setting. They also admitted that it was nice to see the shock and amazement on a woman's face when she first saw their penis.

But, those were the only benefits they enjoyed because they also admitted that their abnormally large penis was a definite disadvantage when it came to the physical act of sex - mostly because their large penis created discomfort and even pain for the woman.

And, because of her discomfort and pain, these men were unable to fully penetrate and unable to fully thrust both of which minimized the sexual enjoyment for both them and the woman.

In other words, it is body to body contact with a penis and a vagina in between that provides maximum sexual pleasure for BOTH men and women.

Think of it like this. No woman in her right mind desires to be suspended atop a pole by her vagina. In contrast, every woman who IS in her right mind, enjoys the pleasure of sitting atop an average-sized penis - as her body connects to her partners body.

You can get a sense of how true this is if you ever watch a woman masturbate. As one hand works her vulva area, the other hand is ALWAYS touching other parts of her body.

More specifically, while her other hand will certainly touch sexual body parts such as her breasts, she will also spend significant time touching non-sexual body parts such as her abdomen or leg or cheek or chest or any number of other body parts.

Why does she do that?

It's because the touching and stimulation of both sexual and non-sexual body parts gives her the maximum amount of pleasure.

Bottom line, be thankful that you have a normal, healthy body with a normal-sized penis because that is exactly what you AND your lady need to for you BOTH to enjoy maximum sexual pleasure.

Make up your mind that this is true.

Let go of the myth that an abnormal penis would serve you or your lady better.

Instead, begin to turn your attention and efforts towards creating feelings of sexual excitement within your lady.

That's what will take things into the STRATOSPHERE for both of you...

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Will The Man Next Door Bed Your Wife?

Recently, a certain husband was complaining about his wife with phrases like the following:

• "She's very unorganized. The house is always a mess..."
• "All she does is sit around and watch TV..."
• "She's always nagging about one thing or another..."
• "She's losing all energy and enthusiasm to do stuff..."
• "Whatever she does now, she does with negative energy, complaints and regrets"

Are you a husband who can relate to these quotes?

If so, I hope to challenge you in this article.

First, stop and imagine yourself in a dead-end job. Everything you are asked to do is totally menial and beneath you. Co-workers don't do their job which in turn, creates more work for you. When you finish your job, you get to start all over and do the same thing again.

Further, your boss has no appreciation or respect for you. In fact, he regularly tells you what an idiot you are to both you and everyone around. There’s no end to the things that your Boss says and does to make you feel stupid.

And, imagine that if you tried to leave and find a better job, all of society would look down on you, black-list you, and your friends and family would disown you.

How are you going to feel?

How are you going to respond?

What are you going to turn into?

Now, picture in your minds eye a certain man next door to you. While you are at work having all this fun, this man starts having conversations with your wife. He starts telling her:

• How important she is.
• What a special person she is.
• How neat he thinks she is.
• How attracted he is to her.

He starts doing and saying things that "breathe life" into her, that give her meaning and value.

You know and I know that even though she may resist for a bit, it won't be long and she'll start responding to this man.

She's going to get a new sparkle in her eye.

She's going to start going out of her way to "run into him".

She's going to start changing her behaviors to live up to the reputation that he’s given her.

Good things are going to happen.

Eventually, funky music is going to start playing in the bedroom.

The woman this man would be interacting with wouldn't be anything like the NEGATIVE person described in the "quotes" I listed at the start of this article.

Now in truth, marriage is still meant to be a sacred relationship and in fact, there may not be some new man next door hitting on your wife.

However, the suggestion that I made to this man may be one that you would do well to consider in your own home and in your own situation…

Pretend like it's you next door and you want to "pick-up" your lady.

Decide that your lady is attractive to you.

Go to work romancing her. Start providing her with meaning and value. Make her feel special. Start making some positive things happen...

…before some man with lady skills and lust shows up in your lady's life.

Copyright 2006, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Wife Cheated: What To Do If Your Wife Ever Cheats On You (Or, What To Do If Your Wife Has Cheated On You)

Here's the first thing I'll suggest: STOP the endlessly-looping question within your head about whether it was truly a mistake that she made that she's really sorry about.

Many men are willing to forgive their wife for her infidelity if they can be convinced that she truly made a dumb, stupid, emotional mistake out of reaction to some stress in her life - and that she's really, truly sorry for her mistake and will never repeat it again.

The man won't like what his wife has done, but he can logically understand it, accept it, and move on.

The problem arises in that the man cannot become convinced in his own mind. He hashes and rehashes the whole thing over and over in his mind. He thinks of the cat getting its first taste of mouse after which that cat will always be a "mouser". And every time he sees or thinks of his wife, he wonders...

And so, the endlessly-looping question is, "Was it a mistake or was it cat & mouse?"

Unfortunately, until time reveals the answer, you can't really know. All you can do is be yourself and continue developing and increasing your attractiveness.

Do you realize you aren't attractive when you continue playing a negative loop of an unpleasant past event?

Do you realize that by replaying this question, you will literally run your wife off - even if she previously viewed her infidelity as a huge mistake?

Do you realize that often, a woman will determine whether she made a mistake based on how much of a wife-seducer her husband becomes from that point forward.

She'll either realize that her infidelity was a mistake - or she'll decide she likes the taste of mouse better - depending upon you.

Now, let me share some good news with you... Contrary to what Hollywood would have you to believe, the overwhelming majority of women who have been unfaithful to their husband report that they really do love their husband and view their infidelity as a very bad mistake that they greatly regret and strongly wish they could go back and undo.

You can know that this is true by considering what sexologists tell us: the more connected a woman feels to her partner the more satisfying the total sexual experience is for her. Further, sexologists tell us that for a woman, an ideal sexual encounter is far more than finding someone to share an orgasm with.

What this means is that a woman who has an anonymous fling or even a fling with an acquaintance will find out that the sexual encounter was FAR LESS gratifying than she expected it to be because it's not based on a positive, genuine, or honest connection - and therefore, the fling has little to no satisfaction.

Now, in spite of everything I've said so far, you may still be trying to figure out why your woman did what she did. So, let me roll one more thing by you...

In general, human beings have a critical flaw - they want external validation. And, when they are shown attention by other people, they feel validated. Therefore, they'll do anything they can to get this attention so that they can get the validation they crave.

Women crave attention. Your wife is a woman. If your wife has cheated on you, it's highly likely that someone gave her a level of attention and validation that was too great for her to resist.

Women want to date rock stars not because they find the man himself exciting but because they find the thought of sharing the limelight exciting.

Ask most any young girl what she wants to be and the words model, actress, or singer are highly likely to be a part of her answer.

Consider this case. Mick Jagger, the lead singer of the Rolling Stones is reputed to have had sex with virtually every woman he knows and thousands more that he doesn't know. And here's what I want you to realize...

All the women that Mick Jagger has had sex with didn't have sex with him because they actually wanted sex with him. They had sex with him strictly because they wanted the attention, prestige, and validation that having sex with the lead singer of a popular and notorious band would give them.

If you were to strip Mick Jagger of his popularity and status as lead singer of the Rolling Stones, probably not even a single one of these women would have touched him with a ten-foot pole.

My point is that if your wife has cheated on you, it's not because you're inferior in any way. It's because she has an internal flaw / need for validation and approval and someone, somewhere was dishing it out more so than you were.

If your wife spends lot's of time hanging out with other people (whether work or play), it's especially important for YOU to CREATE your own time and space where you do things that endear her to you.

So again, if you should discover or have previously discovered that your spouse has had an affair, you'll have to decide what the best course of action for you is - but it may well be that the best course of action is to take the high road and just let it go. And, as you let it go, continue to focus on becoming a better and better wife-seducer because that's a CONSTRUCTIVE mindset that WILL get you what you want - whether with this woman or another one.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Wife Cheated: Has Your Wife Cheated On You?

Overcoming the insecurity that comes from having a wife who’s been unfaithful can be the most difficult form of insecurity to over come. For this reason, I want to give special attention to this emotionally-charged and sensitive subject.

If your wife has ever cheated on you, she shouldn’t have. And honestly, unless you previously cheated on her, there is no good excuse for her infidelity.

Now, I’ll say right up front that this is such a personal matter with so many variables that only you can decide how and what is the best way to deal with your wife’s infidelity. A person can decide that the marriage has been irreparably damaged and get a divorce. Or, a person can acknowledge their partner made a foolish mistake and forgive her for it and move on.

Either way, that’s a personal choice you’ll have to make for yourself. It’s such a personal thing that I’m not sure I can really help you. But, I would like for you to consider some suggestions…

Here’s the first thing I’ll suggest to you: REFUSE TO LET ANY ACTION OF YOUR WIFE’S EAT AT YOU UNTIL IT DESTROYS YOU!

Don’t allow yourself to develop the victim-mentality where you’re constantly reliving and remembering what she’s done. Don’t persist in blaming, condemning, and judging her. It will only serve to poison you with bitterness, resentment, and hatred.

It’s one thing if a woman’s actions destroy a marriage. It’s another thing to LET a woman’s actions destroy a man.

Unfortunately, this is exactly what many men let happen. After they’ve “reconciled” with their wife over her infidelity, they then let it eat on them until HIS MINDSET becomes so poisoned that it destroys both the marriage and himself.

Here’s something else I’ll suggest to you: let her off the hook – your hook. In doing so, you put her on God’s hook – and then it’s up to Him to deal with her as He knows is right and just. You see, a cheating wife has only scarred herself. It’s not on you, it’s on her. God will see to it that she reaps for the evil she’s done.

The Bible tells us, “Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord, I will repay.” Because this is true, you don’t have to worry about what she’s done anymore. You can just let it go, let her off the hook, and let God take care of it in the RIGHT way.

Here’s the next thing I’ll ask you to consider: in truth, both married men AND women cheat on their spouse to varying degrees. Usually and mostly, the cheating only takes place inside the mind. But sometimes, one or both partners make the mistake of taking it to a level that’s outside of their mind.

For women, her “cheating” involves fantasies portrayed to her in soap operas or Harlequin Romances, or in her own fantasies created out of her imagination or experiences she encounters in life.

For men… Well, you already know that most men find pleasure in imagining having sex with any and every attractive woman they encounter. You already know they’re intensely turned on by the thought of having sex with a woman for the very first time, by scoring a one-night stand with a perfect stranger. You already know that it’s not unusual for men to fantasize about having wanton sex with dozens of hot women.

What’s bizarre though is that these same men would have a huge panic / anxiety / insecurity attack if they found out their wife was having the same sort of imaginations that they themselves were having.

Now, how crazy is that?

Wouldn’t it really be better to keep the fidelity of the marriage intact by recognizing that whether male or female, our sexuality is a key part of us and just be open and honest about it?

Wouldn’t it be better to use these sexual thoughts – both yours and hers – to pull you closer together?

Wouldn’t it be better for both of you to share your most secret, intimate thoughts on a bed of trust, respect, appreciation, and privacy that builds sexual excitement between you and your wife – so that neither one of you ever have to go outside of the marriage to enjoy what’s already going on in both your head and hers?

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Why Your Wife Prefers Her Girlfriends Over You...

Men come to me all the time complaining about their wife being gone all the time.

They are angry because their wife is consistently "gone", hanging out with her girlfriends.

To make the problem even worse, they say, these girlfriends are "bad news". They are "men-bashers" of the highest order.

Want to know what I tell them?

"The bad-news girlfriends are doing a better job of meeting your wife's needs than you are - which is why she chooses to hang out with them instead of you."

It's not very pleasant. It doesn't make them feel good. And, it contains the answer these men need to turn their situation around - so that their wife wants to hang out with them and have sex with them - instead of hanging out with the bad-news girlfriends...

The answer is...

"Do a better job at meeting your wife's needs than anyone else she knows."

The man who embraces this philosophy will soon find that his wife spends far, far more time with him than she does anyone else.

Want an easy way to find out how to meet your wife's needs better than anyone else?

Ask her this one question: "Look deep inside of yourself and imagine for a moment that I met and satisfied your every need and desire better than anyone else you know. What would I be doing?"

Whatever it is that she tells you, treat with the UTMOST RESPECT because she will be baring her soul to you. How you treat her response will either take your marriage and sex-life to never-before-seen heights or it will be the straw-that-broke-the-camels-back.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

How To Deal With A Wife Who Has Cheated On You And You Want To Stay With Her...

Now, I'll say right up front that this is such a personal matter with so many variables that only you can decide how and what is the best way to deal with your wife's infidelity. A person can decide that the marriage has been irreparably damaged and get a divorce. Or, a person can acknowledge their partner made a foolish mistake and forgive her for it and move on.

If your case is such that you want to forgive your wife and move forward, then I would like to help you by explaining what forgiveness really means...

Forgiveness rarely means that someone comes to you, tells you they were wrong, and asks you to forgive them.

The tendency in people is to view the act of forgiving as an authority figure (themselves) granting forgiveness to a subject (the other person) who has begged and pleaded for forgiveness. In other words, they think of forgiveness as a ceremonial act of PARDONING another person.

In reality, forgiveness is picking the thorns of negativity out of your own mind.

Forgiveness is casting out the little black thoughts that would like to harbor in the shadows of your mind because of what someone else said or did.

Forgiveness is looking beyond your aggravations, irritations, justifications, and rationalizations.

Forgiveness is putting out of mind the many times others have pained you, upset you, and trod over you.

Forgiveness is refusing to become irritated, aggravated, and frustrated when someone does something you don't like. It's replacing the little "zing's", slurs, or comments you at first want to say with something that makes the other person feel good about themselves.

Forgiveness is no longer allowing it to bother you when others are too fast, too slow, too much, not enough, they did or they didn't, etc.

Forgiveness is stepping outside of your own feelings based on your experiences and values and stepping into the experiences and values of the other person - and then being able to truly say, "I understand how you feel."

If you're unable to step into their experiences and values, then it's accepting them as they are and saying, "You have a right to feel the way you do." or, "I've never experienced that, but I think if I were in your place, I'd probably feel the same way you do."

Forgiveness is keeping quiet when you really want to tell someone how irrational and illogical their behaviors and feelings are. The fact is, if you were in their shoes and had their reasons, you'd probably have the same behaviors and feelings.

Forgiving is choosing to look for and see only the good in others rather than entertaining thoughts of criticism, condemnation, or hatred.

Forgiveness is a lifestyle that does not expect individuals to be faultless - that does not cast people into roles of perfection - because expectations of perfection result in irritation and anger.

Forgiveness is a mindset that understands this person has been hurt by someone, someone has made them feel unwanted and unloved, that they didn't matter, that they didn't count.

Forgiveness is letting go of and giving no energy to the negative, the unpleasant, the undesirable, the unwanted that someone else has injected into your life. And probably, that person is totally indifferent about the whole situation and could care less whether what they did or said was what you wanted. And by you letting go and giving it no energy, that's forgiveness...and you can do that as frequently and often as you need to, can't you?

FOR you must GIVE up on harboring anything in your mind that's not what you want in your life - as your dominant thoughts become what you attract more of. And, after you're through FORGIVING everyone and everything (including yourself if need be), that leaves nothing in your mind but LOVING POWER - the most influential and persuasive power there is.

Understanding, empathy, and tolerance melt away annoyance, judgment, irritation, and aggravation - all of which is summed up in a single word: forgiveness.

Pause for a moment and consider these two quotes from Richard Nixon:

• "The greatness comes not when things go always good for you, but the greatness comes when you are really tested, when you take some knocks, some disappointments, when sadness comes; because only if you've been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain... Always give your best. Never get discouraged. Never be petty. Always remember: Others may hate you. But those who hate you don't win, unless you hate them. And then, you destroy yourself."
  
• "I've not lost until I hate as I've been hated."

I never knew Richard Nixon nor have I ever bothered to study out the Watergate Scandal but these quotes make it clear to me that President Nixon understood what it meant to forgive - even though no one else was asking him for forgiveness.

Think of that! Can you begin to fathom how much POWER and FLEXIBILITY this kind of a forgiving attitude gives you?

Bottom line, forgiveness is for YOU so that your spirit soars free, your mind functions clear and powerfully, your feelings support you positively, and your wife-seduction results are outstanding.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Was He Talking About Your Marriage?

“What do you do for a living?” asked the man standing beside me as I waited for my lunch. “I help create happy, sex-filled marriages.” I replied.

“Really?” was his surprised response. “How do you that?” he asked as he stepped closer to me.

“Well, if you first consider that the idea of being attractive, loving, and sexual is normal and natural for both men and women, you’d think everything would work just fine, right?”

“Right!” he said.

I continued, “But, we all know things happen in marriages that shut these normal and natural functions down, agreed?”

“Absolutely.” he agreed.

“So, what I’ve done is create a formula that a man can use in his marriage to create a response in his wife where she once again wants to be attractive, loving, and sexual to, with, and for her husband.”

“Really?” was his even wider-eyed response. “Say, could we talk about this some more as we eat our lunch?” he asked.

I agreed and as we made our way to a table, he began unloading his story on me...

“My wife is way over-weight, which plain and simple is a sex killer for me! She let herself go after our two kids came along – she just gave up on herself – and now she refuses to do anything about it.

But, being overweight isn’t the only problem – she also has all kinds of medical problems. If she’s not sick with one thing, it’s two of something else.

Not only that, but I’ve had all I can stand of her saying “NO!” in the bedroom.

Between her weight problem, her health problems, and her “No’s”, I’m completely turned off by my wife.

I think I could get back to desiring sex again with her but NOT while she’s overweight and won't do anything about it...about the only solutions I can see are to hope for a fatal heart attack, shoot myself in the head or just get a divorce and experience the bliss of bankruptcy.

I don’t know exactly what your formula is but can it inspire my wife lose weight and become attractive again? I WOULD DO ANYTHING TO GET MY WIFE TO BECOME MORE ATTRACTIVE AND SEXUAL – but I just don’t see how that’s possible.”

As the man finished and slumped over his lunch with a dejected and hopeless look of despair on his face, was reminded yet again of why I do what I do. I smiled at him as I responded...

“I can help you – if you’ll let me...

To do that, I need to tell you a few things that may at first seem a little harsh. But, if you'll take them to your heart-of-hearts and consider them, you'll find that I'm giving you the truth.

First, you need to understand that a woman reacts and responds to the man that's in her life.

Now, I don’t mean that a woman is less than a man in any way because she’s not – I just mean that she is wired in such a way that she is reactionary to the man that’s in her life.

Based on the things a man does, the woman in his life reacts positively, negatively, sexually, non-sexually, etc.

Now, you’ve probably never heard anything like that before but that doesn’t take away its truth. If you think about it, even the most hard-core feminist is reacting to men.

Let me ask you this...what if a man who your wife easily recognized as a top music or movie star walked through the front door of your house right now.

Assuming your wife was at home, do you think she would react and respond in the same way she does when you walk through that same door?

Of course not, you and I both know her reaction and her response would be dramatically different.

The reason I’m saying all of this is to help you understand that YOU have created and are creating the marriage that you currently live in.

The things that you are doing right now (however conscious or unconscious they may be) are causing your wife to react as she is - gaining weight, saying no, etc.

The same thing applies to the health problems...your wife's sickness is nothing more than a reaction to you manifested in her physical body.

The word "disease" means a "body not at ease". So, in fact, your wife's sickness is nothing more than “dis--ease” in her body that's been triggered by the stress, unhappiness, and lack of fulfillment that she is experiencing - as she reacts to you.

I hope you’re starting to get really excited as you think about what I’m saying and recognize that if you have the power to create the kind of marriage that you DON'T want, then by the Laws of Nature, you also have the power to create the kind of marriage that you DO want.

A moment ago, you said you would do ANYTHING to have the kind of wife and marriage you want.

Would you really?

Are you really willing to learn how to do certain things in a certain way in order to create the kind of marriage you want?

I ask you that because most men don't really want to do anything different. The only thing they want to do is point all the blame at their wife. They want their wife to do something to fix herself and all the problems.

The problem is, she can't fix it.

Why?

It’s because she's reacting to the man. She’s reacting and responding to what’s coming to her from the man.

You also said you desire an attractive and sexual wife.

That's an excellent and noble desire, not only for your sake but for your wife and children's sake as well - a happy home is a place where everyone wins.

The question is, are you willing to follow through and make that desire a reality?

You see, it’s YOU who FIRST needs to do "something" – not your wife. It’s you who needs to create a different reaction and response in your wife. That’s what my formula is all about.

And, after you've applied the formula for a time, don't be surprised when your wife starts losing weight, starts becoming more sexual, and her sickness goes into remission or completely disappears.

This is a very powerful concept if you can accept it. Think of a light switch. One could argue for a long time about how and why the light bulb turns on. Or, you can just flip the switch on and enjoy the light.

In the same way, you can let this concept rub your ego in the wrong way and refuse to accept it. Or, you can just use the concept to benefit you, your wife, and your children.”

As I finished, I could tell that this man’s awareness had just went through a monumental expansion. Suddenly, his world was bright and alive with possibility and opportunity where before it was dark and hopeless.

“I’ve got to get back to work.” he said. “How do I get my hands on your formula?”

I pulled out a napkin, wrote my website address on it and handed it to him. As the man dashed out the door, I felt an overwhelming gratefulness for the opportunity to make a difference in yet another marriage.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Want to improve your relationship with your wife?

Recently, my wife, 7 year old daughter and I decided that since it was such a beautiful, cool, and slightly breezy evening that we would take a blanket outside, spread it out on the lawn with some refreshments, and enjoy the evening reading books.

I grabbed a book that I had wanted to finish for a while, strapped on my seatbelt as it were, and got ready for some serious, uninterrupted reading.

Except there was one little problem...

My wife and daughter grabbed a book they "said" they were going to read together. And for the next hour and a half that we spent on the lawn, they were both up and down, in and out of the house, giggling, laughing, playing, getting this, getting that, teasing each other, and in general, fooling around.

If doubt they read 10 lines of text the whole time.

Now on my end, I'm wanting to read my book and so I found myself starting to feel a little bit aggravated. My focus was on reading and anything that interrupted me or distracted me from my reading was a nuisance and an irritant.

In fact, I went so far as to say to them, "You girls aren't getting much reading done are you?"

It was their look of puzzlement, that look at me as if I was from outer-space or some foreign place that caused me to remember that which I already knew...

Females are focused on relating. And anything that interrupts them or distracts them from their relating is a nuisance and an irritant.

And therein lies the "rub". Men are focused on the "doing" while the women are focused on "connecting".

So how do you improve your relationship with your wife?

Of course, there are many answers to this question, but pertaining to this article, the way to improve your relationship with your wife is to force yourself to set aside whatever it is that you are "doing".

Totally forget about "doing" anything and instead focus on the "connecting" and "relating" that she's wanting.

Realize that whatever the "doing" part is supposed to be is really nothing more than a platform upon which she wants to "connect" and "relate".

But be warned, if you take time to "connect" and "relate" to and with her, she might end up "doing" you if you get my drift...

Happily, that's exactly what happened to me.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

The PSF's That Lead To High-Frequency Sex…

A woman who is sexually attracted to a man has one set of PSF’s.

A woman who is turned-off by a man has a very different set of PSF’s.

What are PSF’s?

PSF is an acronym for Pictures, Sounds, and Feelings.

Now, let’s start with pictures…

If you are a man, you know that a sexually attractive woman is one who is visually pleasing to your eyes. Let’s check the validity of this statement…

Pretend for a moment that a haggard, toothless, unkempt, and smelly old woman approaches you and begins saying things that clearly are meant to stroke your ego.

Then, after only a few minutes, she starts saying sexy things to you.

Would you feel sexual attraction towards her?

If you are anything like the average male, the emphatic answer is “definitely not!”

There’s no sexual attraction because visually, the woman is “unattractive”.

But, just because that’s the way it is for a man doesn’t mean that’s how it is for a woman.

You see, for a woman, an attractive man is one who mentally pleases her – one who stimulates her mind in a certain way.

Now, I’m not suggesting that women are searching for toothless, smelly old men but I am affirming that in comparison to men, a woman’s attraction towards a man has less to do with his looks or his body and a more to do with the “pleasure” that the man invokes in her mind.

Let’s use an analogy that will make sense to a man.

Imagine that you are looking to buy a “widget”. Unless you have information that allows you to differentiate the various widgets in the marketplace, you’re only differentiator is price – and so you start shopping based on price.

Well, in the same way, if a man doesn’t provide – read SUPPLY – a woman with pleasurable and exciting mental pictures, then that woman can only “shop” that man based on external factors – what she sees in him and what she hears from him – and then she will create her own picture of that man.

For example, on a least desirable to most desirable scale, she might picture him as:

• Boring
• Sexually needy
• A “Sugar-Daddy”
• Attractive and sexy
• Fun and exciting
• Powerful and influential

As you can easily intuit, a woman feels zero attraction for a man who is boring or sexually needy. In fact, not only does she feel zero attraction for him but she is actually repulsed by such a man.

Why?

It’s because a boring or sexually needy man is a “drain” to a woman – and a man who is a drain DOES NOT create exciting pictures, sounds, or feelings in a woman’s mind.

Allow me to especially emphasize this to married men.

Please understand that if your wife views you as boring and sexually needy, you have a double-kiss-of-death on your marriage. You can bet your last dollar that your wife is either on her way to a divorce court or she is on her way to an affair with some other man – a man who isn’t boring and sexually draining.

Sadly, many men are “surprised” that the man their wife has had an affair with is a total jerk, a mooch, a loser, etc. and they can’t understand why of all men, their wife would go to this kind of guy.

Well, now you know the reason – her lover may have had a lot of negative traits but he absolutely was not a sexually needy BORE!

For clarity’s sake, what is a bore?

The two biggest characteristics of a bore are as follows:

1. A man who thinks, talks, and cares only about his business or his hobby – even when his stated goal is to create more money for his wife.
2. A man who FORSAKES his wife day in and day out as he seeks FUTURE gain.

Do you get it?

Now, let’s hit on sounds…

Far too many men complain and whine their women into virtual insanity.

Far too many men continue to focus on the negatives of life day in and day out, such that their words and even their voice translates into a nasal, abrasive, and grating sound that drives their woman crazy.

Probably, there has been a time where you heard a woman mimicking and mocking a man.

What kind of voice did she use?

That’s right, a whining, nasally, and irritating voice. Of course, the man didn't really sound like that. Rather, she was articulating exactly what she was hearing in her head.

A woman that has these kinds of sounds running through her head will not feel sexual attraction towards the man who is creating these sounds for her.

It’s as simple as that.

But, what if every time a woman heard her man’s voice it took her mind back to times such as when they were on a white, sandy beach where his confident and loving voice soothingly blended with the crashing of the waves?

Can you sense how these kinds of sounds in her head can and do lead to sexual attraction?

Finally, let’s touch on feelings…

Men know that women are especially in tune with their feelings and yet so many men will consistently talk, act, and behave in a way that causes a woman to tune into feelings of:

• Nervousness
• Poverty
• Insecurity
• Inadequacy
• Insufficiency

Think about it. How many people do you know – male or female – who want these kinds of feelings?

Hint: These are not the feelings that any woman wants to feel.

Rest assured that if a man is generating these feelings inside of a woman, she will sooner or later seek to separate herself from the man who invokes these feelings within her.

In conclusion, the man who can invoke the right kind of pictures, sounds, and feelings within a woman is sure to enjoy a long-lasting, happy, and exciting relationship with her.

While it’s true that there’s not a lot a man can do with how he’s physically built, it’s also true that there is a lot that he can do in terms of the pictures, sounds, and feelings that he invokes in his lady.

And that, my friend, is good news for men everywhere.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

The Mystery of Female Ejaculation - Solved!

First the background story…

It started with a girlfriend. We were out parking one night and I had her backed up against the passenger-side seat of my pickup with me standing up outside and I was do’in her. We were both having a great time when all of a sudden there was this “explosion” of liquid that blew all over me – it was like she was having a massive pee on me.

I had never encountered anything like this before but instinctively, I knew it was good. Admittedly, my first thought was that she had pee’d on me but I was ok with that because I knew I was making her feel really good. But my second thought was that there was no smell of urine so I decided that it wasn’t urine. I flat out didn’t know what it was but again, I instinctively knew it was good.

The funny thing was, she was even more shocked and surprised than I was and she got all embarrassed and started apologizing.

Sensing an opportunity, I took on the “air” of “stud” and “this is what it’s like with a real man” (LOL) and calmly, confidently assured her that it was ok and perfectly natural and that I liked it when she did that.

Well, for the next year, it was like the tidal wave was unleashed. Every time we had sex on a bed, 10 -15 towels minimum were required.

And then, it stopped. Totally. Completely. No more “gushers”. No more towels needed. I couldn’t understand it. She would still orgasm multiple times – real, lose-control, contractions all over her body – but no gushers.

I couldn’t figure it out. I even asked several older women who I trusted and they didn’t understand it nor could they explain it either.

Eventually, we parted ways. With all the other ladies, there was never any kind of moisture release when she orgasmed.

For years, the question remained in my head, “Why did one woman “gush” for a period of time and then stop? Why did none of the other women gush?

Then, by happenstance, I came across Female Ejaculation & the G-Spot
by Deborah Sundah. I bought the book and brought it home for my lady to read.

The next day she called me at my office screaming with excitement, “I did it! I did it!” After I several minutes of trying to get her calmed down, I asked her, “You did what?” “I ejaculated” she yelled excitedly, “I read the book you bought me, did what it told me to do and I more than filled up a cup with my ejaculate!”

Well let me tell you, I couldn’t wait to get home that evening so she could “show” me. She did show me and now Female Ejaculation is a regular and exciting part of our sex life.

Now, the explanation part…

Every female alive is capable of ejaculating. It’s just that most never discover or learn of this capability. And, there’s a very specific reason why most women never discover it. It’s because their G-Spot is located approximately 1.5 – 3 inches back inside the top of their vagina.

In contrast, those women who are “natural” gushers have G-Spots that are approximately 1.5 inches or less inside their vagina. In other words, their G-Spot is very close to the outside of their vagina. As such, it is much more easily stimulated by normal sex in the right way that leads to ejaculation.

On most women who are “natural” gushers, if you gently “pull up and out” the top-front of their vagina with your fingers, you can literally see their G-Spot – it’s that close to the front.

For women whose G-Spot is a little further back, they are still able to ejaculate with sex but they may require a specific position in order to get the right stimulation.

For women whose G-Spot is still further back, they tend to only be able to ejaculate by use of a vibrator / dildo. Now, before anyone goes and develops a penis-size complex, all it takes is a 3 or 4 inch vibrator with the diameter of a pencil and she can ejaculate.

So, it’s not that your penis-size isn’t sufficient for her. It’s just that her G-Spot is located in an area where you can’t really get to it to give it the right kind of “upward” stimulation that she needs to ejaculate. That’s ok. In fact, in my opinion, it’s much more interesting to watch a woman ejaculate than it is for her to ejaculate with my penis inside of her where I can’t see the ejaculation actually happen.

Next, you need to know about the “switch”. Let me explain the “switch” in analogy form. If you have central heat & air in your house, then you have a thermostat that serves as the “switch” that turns on or turns off the heat & air. A simple “flick of the switch” to the “off” position and there’s no more air. The equipment's all there but there's no air. It’s off.

In the same way, women have a “switch” that if it’s off, they CANNOT ejaculate. They absolutely have all of the “equipment” but they cannot ejaculate. Where is this switch? It’s the BRAIN! And, it’s any form of negative emotion that turns her “switch” OFF! If your lady is upset at you for some reason, she cannot ejaculate.

That’s why my "gusher" girl stopped ejaculating. After being together for a while, I started doing things that “upset” her and generated “negative emotions” and sure enough, her switch flipped off. The problem was, I was too ignorant to know any of this at that time.

The point is, until a woman totally resolves and releases her negative emotions or hurts, she will be able to turn the switch back on so that she can ejaculate.

Here’s the next thing. Ejaculation is not the same thing as orgasm – although many women can develop their ejaculating ability so that it coincides with their orgasm.

This of course, leads to the question, “How does it feel for a woman to ejaculate in comparison to an orgasm?” Well, women tell me that it feels “nice” or “very pleasurable” but it doesn’t satisfy like an orgasm – they still want the orgasm in order to feel fulfilled.

As far as a woman learning how to ejaculate, just get her the book – it explains it very well.

I will add that there is a video available as a companion to the book but I do not recommend getting it because it’s expensive and even worse, it’s confusing. It shows 3 couples – and the lady ejaculates – but it doesn’t really explain how to do it like the book does. In other words, a woman can learn how to ejaculate from the book. She probably wouldn’t be able to figure it out from just the video.

I hope this is helpful for those men who have not yet experienced Female Ejaculation or those who are confused about it like I used to be.

Also, if you're interested in getting the book, you can get it here:

http://www.nymphomaniacwife.com/BooksForLadies.html

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Penis Size Paranoia

Introduction

Our contemporary world suggests that a man must have a penis that is between 10 and 20 inches or he is an inferior male who cannot really please a woman. Our world further suggests that unless a man has a penis the size of his forearm or the size of a horse's penis, then by default the woman is sexually unhappy and secretly she is longing for a man with a bigger penis.

We could tell you that this is absolutely not true - but you wouldn't believe us...

We could try to tell you not to worry about your penis size - that it is so far down on a woman's list of what is important that it is effectively a complete non-issue...but we won't because we know you wouldn't listen...

The fact is, men are always going to be concerned about the size of their penis...

...so, all we are hoping to accomplish here is to give you some input and some insight that will hopefully help you overcome your paranoia you have over the size of your penis and help you get on with having a great sex life...

See For Yourself

If you were to watch adult female masturbation videos, such as:

• Real Sex Magazine: All Masturbations
• Real Female Masturbation
• 100% Masturbation
• Female Masturbation Sensations

You would see girls masturbating solo and the guy doing the movie providing them with vibrators and dildos of all different sizes.

Guess what else you would see?

You would see these girls reaching right past the big toys and picking up a small one.

Guess what else you would see?

You would see that these girls stimulating their clitorises and inserting the toys 1 - 2 inches deep.

So let me ask you...if big and deep were important, why do they pick up the little toys and barely stick them in?

In these movies, these girls achieve orgasm after orgasm on little toys that are barely inserted into their vagina.

The point is that big and deep isn't important to a woman. You can give your woman orgasm after orgasm - no matter what the size of your penis is.

It's A Matter Of (Her) Anatomy

You see, there is a particularly good reason why these women barely insert the dildos and vibrators into their vaginas.

Sexologists who have spent years researching the female G-Spot have scientifically determined that the G-Spot is located right at the top-front of the vagina in 70% of all women.

By top-front, this means that a woman who has learned to control her G-Spot can actually push it outwards to where it is visible when you pull her pussy lips apart.

In different words, if a man were to stick his index finger right up to the first joint (about 1 inch) and touch the top of 70% of all women's vaginas, he would be touching their G-Spot.

For the remainder of women, these sexologists say the G-Spot is positioned as follows:

• 10% - on the top, 2 - 3 inches inside the vagina
• 10% - on the top, 3 - 4 inches inside the vagina
• 10% - on the top, spread from the front to about 5 inches inside the vagina

This tells us that if all you had was a 3 inch penis, you could easily satisfy 80% of the women in the world.

But of course, you don't have a 3 in penis. You most likely have an "average" penis of around 5.5 inches which means you have the penis size that is best suited to satisfy any woman in the world.
Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

One Reason Men Are Not Able To Shoot Their Ejaculate...

There are two reasons most men don't naturally shoot their ejaculate. I'll discuss one of those reasons in this article.

The first reason is because of the type of stimulation most men use to achieve orgasm.

A man has two primary approaches to stimulating himself to orgasm. The first, and most common approach, is focused on prostrate stimulation. The concept of "pounding" a woman during intercourse is nothing more than a man stimulating his prostrate.

The second approach to stimulation is focused on penis-head stimulation.

When a man is engaged in sexual intercourse, these two types of stimulation are usually blended together resulting in maximum pleasure. (This accounts for why most men are interested in intercourse over masturbation.)

When masturbating, the vast majority of men achieve orgasm primarily from prostrate stimulation - even though most of them don't directly stimulate their prostrate.

What happens, is that as men stroke their penis shaft and/or their penis head, the majority of them either hit the base of their penis with their hand or they bend their penis, or they jerk on their penis as they stroke, all of which indirectly stimulate the prostrate. This leads to an orgasm that is based primarily on prostrate stimulation.

Early in a man's sexual life, he will typically learn a given set of techniques that will bring him to orgasm. From then on, for the most part, he will use the same approach for the rest of his life.

For most men, masturbating in a way that stimulates the prostrate is initially more pleasurable and generally leads to orgasm more quickly - which explains why the majority of men initially learn to reach orgasm based on prostrate-based stimulation - as young men trying to figure it all out, they are trying to reach orgasm before someone catches them or starts wondering what's going on.

And, because most men will tend to use the same technique they learned early on, few will ever experiment with other options.

To prove the sensitivity of prostrate stimulation, try "pounding" your woman during your next intercourse session (where your pelvic area - the area surrounding the base of your penis - is solidly hitting her body - but don't hurt her - "doggy" style is a good position for this test) and see how quickly you start to feel those orgasmic feelings climbing.

Then, continue stroking her but do not allow your pelvic area to hit her and notice that the orgasmic feelings either stop climbing or they may even subside slightly.

Now, the reason all of this is important is because there is a significant side-effect with a prostrate-induced orgasm. When orgasm is achieved through prostrate-based stimulation, the prostrate is so sensitive from the stimulation that the contractions that occur in order to expel semen (called the expulsion stage) are severely hampered.

As a point of comparison, it's like tickling a ticklish person until they inadvertently urinate. They lose the control they normally have over their body functions because of the over-stimulation they feel from the tickling.

In the same way as the tickling analogy, when orgasm is reached by prostrate-based stimulation, your body is hampered in its ability to ejaculate because of the extent of stimulation.

If you would like to see this hampering effect in full force, have your woman masturbate your penis and simultaneously finger your rectum. As she fingers your rectum, she should focus her anal rubbing motions on the area that is between her finger(s) and your penis (which is where the prostrate is located).

While an orgasm in this fashion is very pleasurable, you will find that when you orgasm, you will have virtually no control over your ejaculation and your sperm will ooze and dribble out of you with even less force than you are used to. (In the absence of your woman, you can use a vibrator for the same effect.)

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Men, Don’t Let This Happen To You…

Men who have never been through a divorce seem to generally have a perspective that there was some hidden flaw in the men who have been through a divorce that caused them to deserve what they got.

Further, men who have never been through a divorce have this mindset that should they ever find themselves in divorce court, they will be entitled to a fair trial.

Both of these beliefs are totally inaccurate.

While there are certainly exceptions, most men who have found themselves in divorce court were NORMAL men who went through all the normal gyrations of life – just like you are used to.

And then one day, he comes home from work only to find that his wife has either packed her stuff and left with the kids or that she has thrown his belongings out into the yard, changed the locks, and locked him out of his own home.

The “wife” has “pulled the plug” and decided that she isn’t interested in him anymore – and there is NOTHING the man can do – which leads to the next point…

In a criminal court, we all know that a defendant is entitled to a fair trial by jury.

And, while there are always exceptions and there are certainly flaws introduced by people in our legal system, we know that the accused person more or less gets a fair trial.

But the moment you find yourself in a Family Law Court, everything changes.

There is no fair trial. There is no jury.

The FATE of you and your relationship with your children is TOTALLY in the hands of some judge or some court-appointed evaluator.

By the way, just in case you don’t know this, the vast majority of the people in the Family Law system are ANTI-MAN, MAN-HATING people.

Now, to be fair, there are good judges and family evaluators. But be warned, more often than not, the Family Law Court System is set up so that the man loses, the children lose, and the woman wins – although she almost always loses in the end too – just for different reasons.

The only people who really win in a divorce situation are the Divorce Attorney’s – and they win BIG – at your expense!

Now, you may think that I am painting a totally pessimistic, negative, and unfair picture of our Family Law System and the people that are within them.

Well, if you think I am making this all up, I challenge you, take a morning off and go sit in a divorce court for a few hours.

I promise you will leave with your hair standing on end, your heart shattered and pounding, and fighting for all you’re worth to keep the tears held back – and it won’t even be you that’s going through it – at least not yet.

I guarantee that you will be shocked at how cavalierly people’s lives are treated and handled – and there’s nothing they can do about it.

Again, there are always exceptions. There are men and women who have split amiably without a nasty courtroom experience. But, what I want to bring home to you is that this is the exception and not the rule.

If you should ever find yourself on the receiving end of a woman’s wrath within a court of law, you will soon find that the system is designed for you to lose.

Consider this statistic, 1 in 5 men end up bankrupt after a divorce.

So, how does a man keep himself out of this nasty divorce situation?

Well, one of the things that a man needs to realize is that his lady needs to feel important and special. She needs to feel equal and considered. She needs to feel like she is heard and respected.

If she doesn’t get these feelings from you, then she is VULNERABLE to the first man who comes along and gives her these feelings.

This in turn puts you in a VULNERABLE position where you could easily find yourself in divorce court.

Wake up before it’s too late and start meeting the needs that your lady has.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

How To Solve Erection Problems...

Somewhere along the way, a man will out of the blue begin to have erection problems.

He’ll still have and feel desire for his lady but his penis will simply not cooperate.

He’ll feel embarrassed, humiliated, ashamed, and guilty.

And, his lady will feel just as bad because she now thinks that the man has lost his desire and attraction for her which really rattles her sense of self-worth.

Because it’s going to happen if it hasn’t already happened, let’s explore this phenomenon…

As odd as it may seem, few men seem to recognize the "transition" that happens to them.

For the first part of an average male's life, an erection is an automatic, requires no effort, instantaneous, kind of thing.

For the first part of the average male's life, they think how dumb it is that a woman needs to hear the words first, that she needs to be turned on in her head first, before she is really ready for sex.

And then, the transition happens. All of a sudden, things aren't so instant and automatic.

He thinks something is wrong with him which leads to further anxiety which leads to further erection problems.

At the same time, the lady of the relationship - with all of her own self-doubt - interprets the "malfunction" as something wrong with her.

What we have to consider is that the power of the mind is an amazing thing.

National Geographic magazine has reported more than once on "natives" who woke up on a given morning in perfect health, decided that they had been "cursed" during the night and were dead before nightfall - all because of what they believed in their mind.

Given this example of the mind's power, is it any wonder that men have erection problems when they don't understand what's really happening within their own bodies?

Well, the good news is that most men don't have a real problem. Nature has just "turned the tables on him".

In other words, after the transition happens, the average male needs to hear sexual words first. He needs to get turned on in his head first. He needs foreplay. He needs his wife to talk sexy talk to him. He needs his wife to assure him of her love and care for him. He needs his wife to assure him of his value and importance.

He needs all the things that she needed during the first part of HER life - and that he thought was so dumb. He needs all those things that felt like nothing but an obstacle to him getting what he wanted.

The bad news is that if he doesn't recognize and understand this "transition", then he will start using the power of his mind in a negative and destructive way such that he will end up having genuine and real erection problems.

But, by understanding what's really going on and by asking the wife to slow things down a bit, to talk sexy talk, to affirm him, to open up and expose all of her secret sexual thoughts, a man and a woman can have sex that is far more incredible than anything they've experienced prior to the transition.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

How To Eliminate The "I'm Too Tired" Excuse…

When you hear your lady say she's too tired to make love, you need to understand that more often than not what she's really saying is:

• I have given all I've got to everyone else and I have nothing else to give.
• I need time for me.
• I want someone to hold me.
• I want someone to talk to me.
• I want someone to be my "nurse" for a little while.
• I need someone to care about "me" for a change.
• I want someone to make me feel better

Now that you understand what she’s really saying, you have a couple of choices to make. You pick the result you want from the following choices and carry out the instructions:

Result #1: 0% chance of S E X for the next several weeks

Tell her you despise the day you married her and that if there weren't kids involved, you would dump her in a minute. Then, ignore her while making it very clear you are extremely mad at her for not putting out.

Result #2: 10% chance of S E X tonight

Turn on your "best-behavior" and tell her you love her and that you understand how she feels. Ask her if you can get her a cup of hot tea or something. Then ask her if she would like for you to rub her feet.

Do it different tomorrow…

The real point is that you are too late. You didn’t take responsibility for making sure she was turned on and ready by bed time.

That’s right! As a man, you are the one who needs to take responsibility for turning your lady on so that she is ready for you.

Unfortunately, you may well be too late to change anything for tonight. But, the good news is that tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow, you can cause things to be different.

What are you going to do to turn your wife on? What needs to happen so that you get a different response besides “I’m too tired” from her?

Find the answers and then implement!

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

How To Easily Get Your Woman Out Of A Bad Mood And Into A Good Mood...

Listen up men because you're about to find out how to get your woman out of a bad mood and into a good mood - one that you can enjoy being around.

First, realize that many women wish their man would help them with their mood - but only if he does it in the right way.

So, let's talk about what's NOT the right way...

Suppose you come home to find your woman is in a bad mood. What do you do?

If you're like most men, in an effort to get her into a more enjoyable mood, you respond in some kind of an over-the-top way. For example, you might:

• Try to pull her up with boisterous humor
• Preach at her to cheer up and get some positive mental attitude
• Ignore her totally
• Act as if nothing is wrong
• Start a screeching romp with the kids
• Touch her in a sexual way

All of these "approaches" to fixing her bad mood are virtually guaranteed to generate an even worse mood.

Probably, you've tried some of these approaches yourself and found out that what I'm saying is true, haven't you?

So, here's the solution to eradicating your woman's bad mood...

Using words with appropriately matching body language, you:

1. Match and mirror her right where she's at
2. Say things to her that in her mind are undeniably true
3. Gently lead and guide her to a more positive mood

Now, let me explain these three items...

When I say match and mirror her right where she's at, I don't mean that you actually put yourself into a bad mood and join in.

Rather, you're an ACTOR who temporarily aligns with her - who goes to her same level - who gets in step with her feelings. You're an actor who starts the "play" right where she's at.
And when you do this, it shows that you care, that you understand her, that you're like her. And, that makes her feel very good towards you.

How you match and mirror her is by using the same body language that she's using and by saying two to four statements that are on the same level as her current bad mood and to which she can only respond to with a "yes".

Now, it doesn't matter whether she merely thinks "yes" or actually verbalizes it - what matters is that she is thinking or saying "yes" to your statements.

Then, after you've made these two to four statements on her current bad-mood level, you can then shift your body-language into a more positive position and at the same time, make a more positive statement.

If you're previous statements have resulted in a "yes" in her mind, then she'll say "yes" to your more positive statement too - she'll follow you up to this higher level.

And then, you make two to four more statements at this new, more positive level to which she can only respond to with a "yes". You then repeat this process until you have led her all the way out of her bad mood and into a good mood.

Keep in mind that when you're leading, it's important that you lead in small, incremental steps. Your leading won't work if you try to stretch it all the way from bad mood to good mood in a single bound.

Instead, you want to break up the range from bad to good into three to seven discrete steps - depending upon how sour her mood is.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

How The "Ugly" Wife Can Keep Her Man's Attention On Her (A Story for Women)

Ladies, I am about to share a story with you that contains a powerful concept you can use to change your life. Now, you may not approve of how I came to learn this concept, but that doesn't take away from what a tremendous difference it can make for you...

Having been in strip bars (some totally nude and others partially nude) in big cities like Chicago, Dallas, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and so on, I found my most memorable strip-bar experience while on a trip to Springfield, MO.

I went into this partially nude strip club and there was at least a dozen very beautiful girls with virtually perfect bodies - and not one single man was interested in them...

...because there was this one girl...

Comparatively speaking, she was the ugliest girl there. She was definitely chubby, had stretch marks, and her breast were smallish...

...and she was the girl that every guy in the club was lined up to see.

It didn't take but just a moment for me to see why. In fact, I got myself in line as quickly as I could so I could experience it for myself. Here's what happened when it came my turn...

This stripper gave me a direct look in the eyes that she backed up with words coming out of her mouth which she backed up with the movements of her body - all three of which said, "I absolutely want YOU so bad I can hardly stand it. I want to take you on a sexual pleasure ride like you have never been on before. I am your pleasure doll and no one will ever be able to please you like I will. I am your sexual dreams come true".

What she looked like meant nothing to me. The fact that 100's of other people were seeing me with this woman meant nothing to me. I was happy to be sharing the spotlight with this woman.

Now, isn't that interesting? Kind of goes against the grain of popular belief that men only want the prettiest girl doesn't it?

The "ugliest" girl in this strip-joint commanded the attention of every male patron there - simply because she knew what turned a man on and she had the confidence to give him what he wanted - and she understood that what she looked like wasn't all that important.

This story illustrates an important truism.

How a person is "packaged" has very little bearing on what they can be, achieve, accomplish, and have.

An "average" person with the right attitudes within them, combined with the ability to direct those right attitudes at other people in the right way will, in the long-run, win out over a "pretty" person who does not have the right attitudes and who is self-centered.

In other words, the strippers in the above story who were "packaged" better (better looking) couldn't touch the stripper who wasn't "packaged" as well (not as good looking) but who was confident enough in herself to give others what they wanted.

What this means to you is that your attitude and perspective towards your man is far more valuable, important, and attractive to him than any physical traits you may or may not possess.

Certainly, you should continue to strive to be as attractive as you can. But, all you can do is all you can do. When you've done your best on your appearance, then your attitude, confidence, and perspective is all you need to "get you the rest of the way home" in terms of keeping your man's attention.

Now, you may view this concept of the "anatomical packaging being unimportant" as suspect so let me ask you a question?

Have you ever known or heard of a man or woman leaving/divorcing their companion for someone who wasn't nearly as attractive as their first companion was?

Of course you have.

Why would a rational person do this?

Because the new, "ugly" companion knew what the "ugly" stripper in this story knew - if I can confidently give my companion what he wants (assuming it meshes with my values), I can and will defeat every "competitor" no matter how pretty she may be.

Ladies, a word of caution though... When you grab him and you are looking him square in the eyes, go easy on him, you may give the poor fellow a heart attack :-)

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

SURVEY FOR WOMEN

How Do I Seduce My Wife?

The husband who wishes to enjoy sex more often must get clear on the fact that his wife is not interested in any kind of an offer where she loses.

In other words, a man’s wife will almost always reject a seduction attempt if she in any way thinks, believes, or feels that in the final outcome she will lose.

Now, there are an endless number of specific ways a woman can lose. Fortunately, we can wrap all of those variations up into a simple, easy-to-understand pattern – and it has to do with a wife giving more than she receives.

I call this the Loss-Pattern and here it is:

"In a woman’s mind, any situation where she can give physical and/or emotional pleasure without receiving an equal or greater level of physical and/or emotional pleasure in return is considered a loss situation that is to be avoided at all cost."

At first, this pattern may seem so broad as to not be very useful. But, after you think about it a little more, you’ll begin to see its usefulness and the beauty of its inherent flexibility.

To start with, browse through the following list of examples where men commonly invoke the Loss-Pattern, causing their wife to avoid and reject his future sexual advances:

1. A husband thinking only of himself and his pleasure before, during, and after the sexual act. He doesn’t notice or care if she’s into the experience or if she’s even really stimulated or turned on. He only cares about jumping in and taking care of himself.

2. A husband failing to notice that his wife is uncomfortable or hurting during sex. Even worse, he notices her discomfort or pain but continues on because he only cares about getting himself off.

3. A husband giving no regard to whether his wife might become pregnant or at risk health wise. A fertile woman takes on the risk of having to spend the next 20 (or more) years raising and caring for a child every time she engages in sex. Further, medical science tells us that a woman is at greater risk than a man is of contracting a STD or developing a sexual health problem such as a yeast infection.

Husband, take a few moments to carefully compare this list to your own bedroom actions and behaviors. Consider it carefully because most men think it does NOT apply to them while their wife says that it DOES apply to them.

The fact is, the husband who is guilty of any of these inconsiderate violations (and there are plenty more that could be listed) will soon find his woman resisting most or even all of his sexual advances.

She’ll resist because he’s presenting her with an offer where he “wins” and she “loses”.

Guess what?

No wife is interested in that kind of offer.

Now, let’s consider the “opportunity” aspect of the Loss-Pattern. Of special importance is the phrase, “physical and/or emotional pleasure”. This is especially important because it gives the husband multiple opportunities and paths by which he may seduce his wife.

Ideally, a woman will get peak levels of pleasure both physically and emotionally from a sexual encounter. However, given the stresses, responsibilities, and constraints of life, this isn’t always possible.

In general, a woman’s source of pleasure can cycle between the physical aspect and the emotional aspect of love-making. It all depends upon what’s going on in her life, what external influencers she may be encountering, where she’s at in her cycle (if she’s a menstruating woman), the approach of her husband, and a myriad of other factors that can move her from one aspect to the other.

(On the fringes of normal, there are some women who have an under-developed sexual response and so their pleasure comes primarily from the emotional aspect of love-making. On the other extreme, there are women who have emotionally shut themselves down and so they only allow themselves to feel the physical aspect of love-making.)

So again, the opportunity for the seducing husband is that there are multiple ways that he can give his wife pleasure.

Perhaps one of the best examples of this concept that I’ve ever come across is the story of a woman who suffered a back injury that permanently paralyzed her from the waist down. The net effect was that she could feel nothing during sexual intercourse – and yet this woman wanted sex and enjoyed having sex with her husband.

Now, how could that be?

It was simply because her husband made it a very emotionally satisfying experience for her every time they made love.

This brings us to the corollary Win-Pattern that every husband should firmly implant in his mind if he desires to successfully seduce his wife. The pattern is:

"A woman will want to give physical and/or emotional pleasure any and every time she knows she can get an equal or greater level of physical and/or emotional pleasure in return."

As a husband becomes better and better at basing his seduction around the framework of this Win-Pattern, he’ll find himself becoming a better and better seducer – seducing his wife more and more often.

Eventually, he’ll reach a Pavlovian-like sex-life. Just like Ivan Pavlov could ring a bell and his dogs started salivating because they expected to be fed, this kind of husband can ring the “sex bell” and his wife will start desiring sex because she expects to get physical and/or emotional pleasure.

To some, this might sound a bit crass, but since it’s a win for both husband and wife, that makes it good.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Here's What You Need To Know About Penis Size and Female Sexual Satisfaction…

People the world over assume that certain things are true when in fact there is nothing true about them.

One such false-assumption that causes problems in relationships everywhere is the myth that a bigger penis is better.

There seems to be this persistent, nagging assumption in most men’s minds that a penis that is bigger than their own will provide a woman with greater sexual satisfaction than their average-sized penis will provide.

Men understand that a female’s vagina is designed to expand and so they take this knowledge and jump to a totally untrue premise – that if the female vagina is designed to expand, then greater expansion must – by definition – mean greater pleasure.

THIS IS NOT TRUE!

Just because something is designed to expand doesn’t mean above-average expansion is pleasurable.

Here’s a test you can try on yourself to prove the validity of what I’m saying…

You’re skin is designed to expand. Try expanding it beyond what’s “normal” and “average”. By expanding your skin beyond “normal” and “average”, you’ll quickly find out that it is anything but pleasurable.

Similarly, when most women think of above-average expansion of their vagina, they don’t think of pleasure, they think of child-birth. You already know that child-birth is an experience that women everywhere describe as anything except pleasurable.

In fact, even with all the maximum strength forms of pain elimination, it is still one of the most painful experiences that most women ever deal with.

So, just because a woman’s vagina seems like it could easily expand more doesn’t mean that greater expansion would mean greater pleasure for her.

Now, let me ask you a question. Have you ever been in a public social situation where a female has become sexually turned on and attracted to a male? It doesn’t matter if the male was you or someone else. All that matters is remembering the scene (and I’m not talking about movies – I’m talking about real life) where you’ve observed a female becoming sexually turned on towards a male.

What was it that turned her on sexually?

She couldn’t see the male’s penis so she had no idea what his penis size was.

This means that it wasn’t penis size that turned her on.

But yet, she was turned on sexually. What was it that turned her on sexually?

Well, in relation to this article, what I want you to realize is that a “normal”, “average”, and firm erection is all that a female needs from you on the physical plane.

Beyond that, everything she needs for maximum sexual pleasure is on the mental plane – on the plane of thoughts and feelings.

So, quit worrying about your penis size, and start learning how to excite her in the world of her thoughts and feelings.

By doing so, you can quickly create a sexual obsession in your lady towards you - and that’s something an above-average penis size could never do for you.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Find Out What Penis Width Your Woman Prefers...

In my business of helping men create a hot and steamy marriage, I commonly encounter men who are overly-concerned about their penis diameter (often called girth) because they feel like the fit in their lady’s vagina is a little “too loose”.

I always send these men home with a little “research project” that always removes all their concern – and now, you too can find out what penis width your lady prefers.

Here’s how; the next time your lady is in a sexually-oriented frame of mind, ask her this question, “How many fingers give you the most pleasure when you insert them into your vagina?”

Or, if your lady is one of those who won’t to admit to inserting fingers in her vagina, you can modify the question to, “How many fingers should I insert in your vagina to give you the most pleasure?”

Then, follow up her answer with this question, “Why does that number of fingers feel best?”

You’ll probably be surprised at what most men report back…

Relative to the first question, approximately 80% of women PREFER a single finger inserted into their vagina because that feels most pleasurable to them.

The remaining 20% of women say they PREFER two fingers inserted into their vagina because that feels best to them.

So far, not a single man has come back reporting that his woman preferred three or more fingers. Not a single one.

Here’s what they report on the second question…

Of the 80% who preferred a single finger, they unanimously answer the second question with some variation of, “I like the way a single finger feels wiggling around inside me.”

Of the 20% who preferred two fingers, they unanimously answer the second question with some variation of, “I like the firmness and stiffness that I feel with two fingers.

Now, I want you to consider the physical dimensions of a finger. The average human middle finger (both male and female) ranges between 0.75 inches and 1 inch at its widest point. With two fingers, that adds up to a range between 1.5 inches and 2 inches at the widest point.

Ok, here’s a question for you: “Can you wiggle a firm penis that’s at least 0.75 inches wide at the widest point inside your woman’s vagina?”

Your answer is probably something along the lines of:

• “Of course!”
• “Easily!”
• “Yes, absolutely!”

That’s exactly my point… you’re made and your lady is made exactly how you both need to be made so that you can give each other maximum pleasure.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Do Shopping and Sex Go Together?

Have you ever heard men complaining about women shopping?

Those are the men who rarely get to enjoy sex with their lady.

After I share this little technique with you, you will want your woman to go shopping all the time...

No matter who you are, you have "needs". Men have their needs and women have their needs. We all know this.

We also know that when these needs are violated, we become very emotional and we start looking for some way to "resolve" and "repair" our violated feelings.

Guess what?

Every time your lady goes shopping, her needs are violated. The display dummies are super-thin. The advertising pictures show nothing but exceptionally beautiful ladies. I could go on and on, but the point is, everything that is important to her is "one-upped" when she goes shopping.

Though she'll probably never say a word and though she may act like she enjoys shopping, she WILL come home with feelings of insecurity and she will be emotionally upset deep down inside.

But, when you meet her at the door and immediately start "repairing" and "resolving" - meeting her needs in other words - it won't be just a little while and she will be pulling down her ...

She gets what she wants, you get s e x

Go send your wife shopping :-)

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Before you have an affair, before you cheat on your wife, reconsider your options…

There are countless men who have agreed to narrow their intimate female relationships down to a single woman – usually in the form of marriage – in exchange for the perceived and IMPLIED promise of on-going and regular sex with this one woman.

All too often, what they find instead is that they have legally bound themselves to a wife who’s not very interested in sex – especially after children come along. These men are now party to a sexless marriage.

So, to try to make things better, these men carry out the commonly prescribed treatments…

They buy her flowers and try to be romantic. Only to hear their wife say, “Not tonight, honey!”

“Well, that didn’t work” says the man, so he tries something bigger – like taking her on a vacation to a special place or by buying her that new car she’s been wanting.

And after all that, when the man tries to initiate sex with his wife, she condemns him with something like, “Is sex all you ever think about?”

Eventually, these men despair of ever enjoying even occasional sex with their wife – let alone regular sex. It’s at this point, that these men begin thinking about having an affair. It’s at this point that they start thinking about where to find a mistress.

In truth, most men can honestly say, “I don’t want to cheat on my wife.” For most of these men, their most desirable option is that their wife would become more sexual.

In fact, that’s the question that rolls over and over in their heads, “How can I get my wife to be more sexual with me?”

But, they can never seem to find the answer. And that leads them to their second-most desirable option which is to divorce their wife and go find a woman who wants to be more sexual.

The problem is, there are all these inter-connections – children, extended families, financial commitments, business relationships, religious affiliations, etc. – such that the impact and the consequences of divorcing are just too much for most men.

So, to continue going without sex is not an option. The consequences and ramifications of divorce are too great so that’s not a good option. As far as they can see, their only remaining option is to go against their own morals and code of ethics and seek sex outside of their marriage.

It’s not what they want but it’s the only viable choice they can see. Well, I can certainly understand a man reaching such a conclusion.

But, before you go have that affair…before you go cheat on your wife, I’d like to ask you to reconsider your first and most desirable option…having a wife who has a greater desire for sex.

Let me first ask you a question; can you imagine your wife being in the presence of some other man and being sexually aroused? Is there some male movie star or music idol that you’re pretty certain your wife would get sexually excited if she were to find herself interacting with this man?

If your answer is, “Yes, I can imagine that” – and for most men the answer is “Yes” – that’s great news. That’s great news because it proves your wife is a sexual woman – no matter how non-sexual she may seem towards you at the moment.

The even better news is that you don’t have to be a movie star or a music idol in order for your wife to become sexual with you. All you have to do is be able to recreate those same feelings and emotions within your wife that she would naturally create on her own with the movie star or music idol.

And that my fellow man IS something YOU CAN DO – no matter what you look like and no matter what your occupation is. It’s simply a matter of learning how to do certain things in a certain way with your wife – and you can do that.

Copyright 2008, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

Are You Inadvertently Making One Of These 3 Mistakes Trying To Start Your Woman's Sexual Motor?

It’s Not In Your Looks

You can have a perfect forehead, chin, smile, and even a perfect pair of dimples but none of these will start a woman’s sexual motor. You can work out at the gym all week long, week after week and look like Mr. Atlas, but you aren’t going to start a woman’s sexual motor with your muscles.

Granted, you might get her attention for a brief moment – just like any other kind of abnormality she might notice would get her attention – but your looks won’t turn her sexual motor on.

Why?

Once a woman decides to enter into a relationship, looks no longer matter to her – if they ever mattered to her at all.

Now, I’m not dismissing the necessity for neatness, trimness, and cleanliness. These are things a woman expects of a man. But, they are not what start her sexual motor.

It’s Not In What You Have

You can wave big wads of cash around. You can wear Armani suits. You can wear a Rolex. You can drive a super expensive car. You can flaunt any other material possessions in front of a woman and you simply aren’t going to turn her on.

As obvious as this may seem, there are men worldwide trying to capture a woman’s attention by means of their possessions.

The danger with this approach is that you may trigger her “greed factor” such that she is attracted to you in terms of what she can “get” from you. But, because she’s not being true to herself, sex will be something she despises.

This phenomenon can easily be seen in “marriages” where an attractive young woman is married to an old and wealthy man. Both the man and the woman know that the marriage is based on purely selfish motives and nobody’s sexual motor has ever been started based on selfishness.

It’s Not Your Social Status

Many men mistakenly believe that if they were in a position of prominence, or if they were a celebrity, or if they held some kind of high-profile social rank, that they would then be able to start a woman’s sexual motor.

And in fact, there are cases where a woman is attracted to a high social status man simply for the attention and prestige that being affiliated with such a man will bring to her. But once again, this kind of a relationship is founded on shallow and hollow premises.

And, as it has been proven again and again, the very thing the woman was attracted to will soon become the thing she despises the most. And when a woman despises, her sexual motor is definitely turned off.

The number of women throughout history who have left high-profile men in favor of a “no-name” man is incalculable. In fact, the tabloid magazines show us this phenomenon on a regular basis – where some starlet has dumped the celebrity she has been dating and is now dating some unknown man who is just short of being down-right ugly.

Why would women do this?

Because the “no-name” guy clearly knows how to start her sexual motor while the prominent guy did not.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

A Story For Sexually Frustrated Men...

My friend was seriously unhappy.

He never said anything about his unhappiness. He never complained. But, I could see the hurt, anger, and frustration that seethed and stewed inside of him. It was all there below the surface.

Try though he might, he couldn’t hide the unhappy story that was etched into his face and eyes – the story of “I’m doing everything I’m supposed to do but what I want isn’t coming back to me.”

Because I cared about my friend, I asked him to take a ride with me. As I pointed my car down a scenic highway, we just rode in silence – my friend wrapped up in the turmoil of his thoughts. After several miles, with tears in his eyes, he finally broke and unloaded on me. Here’s what he said…

“My problem is that my wife is never in the mood. It’s been years since she initiated sex. And, when I finally get past all of her “sexual avoidance tactics”, she just lays there like a lump of coal, no emotion, no kissing, and no movement of any kind. I feel like I am raping her. At that point, I am so furious and frustrated that I would rather just stop and finish myself off. But, the feelings of humiliation from that are even worse.

And, I don’t get it. On my end, I’m doing everything I’m supposed to do. I’m a good provider for her and our children. I take time to talk with her and I listen to what she has to say – we even have dinner together almost every day. We have a nice home, she drives a nice car – you would think I would get something coming back to me, wouldn’t you?

And yes, she takes good care of our kids – and that’s the problem, she takes good care of everything and everyone except me.

I tell you, after years of her lack of interest in sex, I’m to the point that I feel nothing but hatred towards her. I’m fed up with being sexually needy. I’m sick and tired of getting the “cold-shoulder”. I’m through with being made to feel like I’m some kind of pervert just because I have sexual needs.

I used to love her with everything that’s in me – and maybe there’s still a little love buried down deep somewhere – but right now the flame is gone and all that’s left is bitter resentment.

And you know what’s most frustrating of all? I know it used to be in her. When we were first married, she was great. Now it’s like her sexual interest is completely gone – died out – and it’s killing me too.”

As you can tell from the story, my friend believed that he was fully meeting the needs of his wife but his wife was not meeting his needs in return – and as you know, unhappiness is exactly equal to expectations unfulfilled.

But now, let me tell you what was really going on – and check to see if this is the case with you. Because my friend was not meeting the most important needs of his wife, he had literally and physically turned off her sexual faucet and he didn’t even realize it.

Yes, it was true that he was meeting some of her basic financial and security needs. But that’s not at all the same thing as meeting her needs in a way fires up her sexual engine. It’s not the same thing at all.

That’s so important; let me say it again in different words. It doesn’t matter if you are meeting your lady’s surface-level needs if her deep-level needs are unmet.

And that was exactly the case with both my friend and his wife. He wasn’t meeting her deep-level needs which over the course of time had turned her off such that she was no longer interested in meeting his deep-level needs.

As we continued down the road, I told my friend about my ATTRACTIVE NYMPHOMANIAC formula that I had developed for opening back up a woman’s sexual faucet – and opening it up onto her man.

Let me give you a quick example of what I shared with him…

You know that females crave romance. Now, let me ask you, what is romance?

I’m serious. What is your answer? How would you define and describe romance?

If your answer was anything like most men’s, your answer revolved around “flowers and dinner”.

Truth is, you already know that’s not right because if you’ve been with your lady any time at all, you’ve bought her flowers and taken her to dinner and all it did was make her even madder at you – didn’t it?

So obviously, romance isn’t about flowers and dinner.

Here’s how I explained what romance is to my friend…

For a woman, romance is making her feel special. It is making her feel like, of all the available women, she is the only one you are interested in. When you asked your lady out on dates before you were married, it made her feel special because you were choosing her above all the other females around.

But this need to feel special doesn’t end for a woman when she gets married.

Even after marriage, your wife still needs to feel like she’s the most important person in your life. That’s why your wife needs you to “court” her even after you are married. She still has that need to feel like you are “chasing” her and trying to “win” her.

Now, that’s very different than trying to “bribe” and “soothe” her with flowers and dinner, isn’t it?

You can see that now, can’t you?

Anyway, as I continued describing the formula, my friend became more and more excited. His eyes began to literally glow. He now understood why the sex had died off in his marriage. More importantly, he clearly understood how to go back home and create a marriage of love, sex, and passion.

After our little road-trip, it was almost a month before I saw my friend again. He positively glowed such that I hardly recognized him. Clearly, something was very different for him. As soon as we had a private moment, I asked him how things were going.

Here’s what he told me…

“She’s initiating sex all the time now. I’m starting to worry about whether I’ll be able to keep up with her now. Thanks for sharing your ATTRACTIVE NYMPHOMANIAC formula with me. It has made all the difference in my life and in my home.”

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.

3 Simple, Easy Tips to a Happier, More Fulfilling Marriage...

Commonly, men and women hold a distinction in their minds between themselves and their marriage. Their personal self is one thing and their marriage is another.

Perhaps this makes sense at certain levels, but when a marriage has fallen short of what it’s meant to be, this notion is problematic. It’s problematic because there’s often an unconscious concept that it’s the “marriage” that needs help rather than one’s self.

In other words, the marriage becomes a third-party entity that needs help – but a third-party entity can seem hopelessly hard to help because it involves “other” people.

The solution is to rid yourself of the mostly-unconscious notion that your marriage is an unknown third-party entity without a face and realize that your marriage is you and another person – and that means a FULL 50% of your marriage is completely and totally in your control.

And, when you personally INSIST that your 50% share of the marriage is going to be right and good, it’s highly probable that you’ll influence the remaining 50% of the marriage to be right and good too.

So, keeping in mind that it’s useful and helpful to try to “fix” one’s “self” rather than a “marriage”, here are three tips YOU can use to make your 1/2 right and good:

1. Become Happier Yourself

While you certainly want to be happy with someone you care about, it’s not another person who can make you happy. Only you can make yourself happy.If you’re looking to your spouse to “make you happy” you’re sure to be disappointed. And, the more you look to them to make you happy, the unhappier you’ll become. And that makes it even more impossible for you to be happy.

But, when you make yourself happier, oddly enough, that’s when you can be happier in your marriage TOGETHER.

That means taking personal responsibility for doing things that make you happy.

There is something you can do right now that once you’ve done it, you can’t help but feel happier – and more able to appreciate and enjoy your marriage.

Maybe it’s a dance class. Maybe it’s a workout at the gym. Maybe it’s simply flipping through some picture albums. I’m not sure what it is, but you already know.

Go ahead, scan right on past all of the CANT’S and go right to the CAN’S!Let go of what you can’t do.

Let go of what you don’t have.

Let go of what’s unavailable or out of reach for now.

Let go of what someone else should or should not have done.

Within the realm of your own personal self and the resources available to you, what can you do right now that will cause you to feel happier?What is it? Let your mind feed you the answer, right now, and then go do it.Your marriage will be the happier for it.

2. Remember To Have Fun

Any and every unpleasantness can not only be more bearable but in some cases it can even be made to be enjoyable when it’s mixed with some fun. And, all it takes to have fun is a bit of imagination.

Think of small children. Nothing more than a cardboard box and a vivid imagination can lead to an entire afternoon of amazing fun.

A husband and wife I know tell of two years in college where they were financially unable to eat out at even a cheap restaurant. But still, every Friday evening, they would scrape together enough change to buy two tacos apiece from a nearby taco vendor.

Then, as they sat at a rusted old picnic table and ate their tacos they would pretend they were eating delicacies from different countries around the world. They would describe to each other what it was they were eating and how wonderful it was. They would even get into describing the surrounding sights and sounds that accompanied their food.

As silly as this may seem, this couple was able to create powerfully happy memories in spite of it being an extremely difficult and unpleasant time in their lives. Incidentally, the time eventually came when they did in fact enjoy the delicacies, sights, and sounds that they imagined during those times when they had no money.

What about you?

What silly things can you do with your spouse that cost little to nothing but could be immensely fun – and make unpleasant circumstances more bearable?

Could you go to a nearby state or federal park and imagine you’re walking in your own private park and the people who work there are your employees whose job it is to take care of the grounds and facilities for you…

Or, could you rope off a ring in your living room and have a pillow-fight where you pretend that you and your spouse are contending for a UFC or WWF Championship? As fight contenders, what wild, wacky and weird name would each of you assign to yourselves? What kind of outrageous outfits could you each get into? Do you have one kid who can be the announcer and another who can be the referee?

Possibly, you’re feeling better already just for having let your mind imagine yourself being in these silly – yet fun-sounding – scenarios.

What makes a clown funny? It’s his or her “clowning” around, right? It’s their goofiness, silliness, absurdity, and even utter nonsense that makes them funny, is it not?

You could be goofy, silly, absurd, and nonsensical if you wanted to be, couldn’t you?

3. The Only Thing That Doesn’t Change Is Change Itself

It’s useful to remember that the way things are right now is not how they will always be.Things WILL change.

And eventually, they change for the better.

Experience has shown that no matter how unpleasant things may seem right now, sooner or later things turn around for the good.

Knowing then that better times are coming, what can you do right at this time to help prepare for – or even to receive – these better times?

What can you do at this time to PRE-ENJOY these better times?

What satisfaction can you garner from merely ANTICIPATING the coming better times?

What are the things that are good and right, now? What do you have and enjoy at this moment that if you lost it, you would really be unhappy?

One exercise that’s a real eye-opener is to write down a list of everything that if you didn’t write it down, it would be gone tomorrow morning. As a basic yet important example, on your piece of paper, you’d probably want to write down vision since your life would undoubtedly be significantly worse off if you were to lose your eyesight.

When you consider all that you have and enjoy in light of losing it if you don’t write it down, you begin to see just how much is right and good in your life.

If arrival at a desired destination is the only time and place one can be happy, then life is destined to be an unhappy affair.

And, when you set your mind to it, you can begin to notice and enjoy happiness and satisfaction during the journey to the destination too.

Conclusion

If you’ll free yourself to do it, you can make yourself feel better by choosing to do things that make you feel happier.

If you’ll let loose your lighter side and activate your imagination, you can make the mundane exciting and the unpleasant bearable – all while creating fond memories that you’ll look back on for the rest of your life.

If you’ll join yourself to the idea that good sooner or later prevails and that everything eventually turns to the good, and while you share your marriage with your spouse you begin to notice all that is good and right at this time, the path of life becomes so much more enjoyable.

By personally choosing to act on these three tips right away, you begin to do your part to create a happier, more fulfilling marriage.

Copyright 2007, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article ONLY if a resource box pointing to http://www.marriedandhappy.com/ is included with it.