How To Have A Sex-Filled Valentine's Day: Husband Tip #4

Husband, if things are a little tense or unhappy between you and your wife right now... Or, if everything seems to be ok but just not very sexual, then you've still got a few days to turn things around and have yourself a sex-filled Valentines Day. Here's Tip #4...

(Note: If you missed the previous tips, view them here: Tip #1 : Tip #2 : Tip #3)

One of the designs in life is the one of IMPEDANCE. This design can be quite useful when there's a need to "shut it down", "turn it off", "stop movement", "resist flow", or "close up".

So for example, things like the brakes on your vehicle are useful if you're one of those who prefer to stop your car by means other than crashing.

In other cases, this design can be rather...shall we say, "unwanted"...like when you're in the mood to make love to your wife and she's resisting.

Here's what you need to be aware of...

Your wife has a whole slew of "mini-programs" that all serve to engage her SEXUAL IMPEDANCE.

Permit me to give you an example...

Let's say you behave in an arrogant manner towards your wife. Without any conscious effort, your wife fires off her mini-program that says, "I do not like arrogance" and **BAM**, her sexual impedance is engaged. The result? Small chance of sex for you tonight!

Are you wondering what some of the other mini-programs are that engage your wife's sexual impedance so you can avoid them?

If so, I'll share some of them with you right now:

• I do not like men who are know-it-alls
• I do not like men who have to prove a point
• I do not like men who have to be right
• I do not like men who are selfish
• I do not like men who are self-centered
• I do not like men who put themselves way above their families
• I do not like men who believe they are entitled
• I do not like men who think emotions are weak and unimportant
• I do not like men who make me feel unsexy or unattractive
• I do not like men who are wimpy
• I do not like men who are braggarts
• I do not like men who lie and are dishonest
• I do not like men who are insecure
• I do not like men who are passive, apathetic, or lazy
• I do not like men who are bullies
• I do not like men who are critical, judgmental, or negative
• I do not like men who are tacky, unclean, unkempt, or ungroomed

Fellow, here's how it works... If you do anything that UNCONSCIOUSLY triggers any of the above mini-programs in your wife's mind, it WILL engage your wife's sexual impedance to some degree or another – she will to some extent resist sex with you.

But, if you do things often enough that you CONSCIOUSLY trigger any of the above mini-programs – meaning that you do it frequently enough that she's consciously-aware of what you're doing that she dislikes – then you STRONGLY engage your wife's sexual impedance. She will STRONGLY resist sex with you.

So, the message is simple; your wife is REACTING to what you're doing – don't trigger mini-programs that engage her sexual impedance between now and Valentine's Day.

Think of it like this: your wife is made by God in such a way that she's on a track that leads straight to your bed and she'll NATURALLY roll right into that bed all naked for you as long as you don't push any of her many BRAKES that STOP her sex-car before she gets there!

Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article as is and unchanged ONLY if a resource box pointing to www.MarriedAndHappy.com/Catalog is included with it.

How To Have A Sex-Filled Valentine's Day: Husband Tip #3

Husband, if things are a little tense or unhappy between you and your wife right now... Or, if everything seems to be ok but just not very sexual, then you've still got a few days to turn things around and have yourself a sex-filled Valentines Day. Here's Tip #3...

(Note: If you missed them, here's Tip #1 and Tip #2)

Have you ever stopped to really notice how a genuinely kind person makes you feel on the inside?

Have you ever noticed how that when a person speaks kindly to you they make everything seem so SAFE and OK?

Have you ever noticed that when some person deals with you in a kindly way, they make it seem as if it doesn't matter that you're less than perfect because you're plenty good enough?

Have you ever had someone in kindness make you feel as if you should bring your gifts out of hiding and bring them forward where they'll not only be accepted but even appreciated and valued?

Have you ever really messed something up or fallen short of the desired standard – and yet in kindness, you were given the opportunity to try again – even when someone else could probably have done it better and faster?

Have you ever watched someone handle another person in kindness even though they had the authority, power, right, and even good reason to treat them otherwise?

Did you notice the feelings of admiration you felt towards that kind person?

Do you remember telling others about how impressed you were with the kind person?

Maybe, even as you're reading these questions, you can start feeling some of these feelings again and notice how wonderful they feel.

And, if these are such good feelings to you, can you imagine how much more pronounced these feelings would be for your wife – someone who's even more in tune with feelings than you?

Well, let me tell you...when a woman encounters a kindly man, it invokes a particular response in her...it makes her want to get closer to that man – and surrender herself to the "SEXUAL LOVING CARE" of that kindly man.

But, for this to happen, it has to be a certain form of kindness...

Kindness that's expressed for the sake of getting someone else to "like" you or "do" something for you or to "accept" you or "approve" of you WON'T work.

What WILL work are expressions of kindness coming from a man who is non-arrogant, non-condescending, strength-filled, has power-in-reserve, and who has attained a measure of success but yet remembers humbleness because of his own past mistakes and failures.

What WILL work is being gentle when you could be rough, being respectful, when you could be disrespectful, being kind when you could be unkind, being loving when you could be unloving, being complimentary when you could be uncomplimentary, being approving when you could be un-approving.

What WILL work is making someone feel safe when you could make them feel unsafe or making them feel good about themselves when you could make them feel badly about themselves or making them feel valuable and worthwhile when you could make them feel valueless and worthless.

When a man has this kind of strength so much so that he's able to be BIG ENOUGH to treat his wife with KINDNESS, it translates into a VERY SEXUAL feeling inside his woman.

So, between now and Valentine's Day, treat your wife with the RIGHT KIND of KINDNESS and see for yourself what happens. I'm quite sure you're going to like the results.

Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article as is and unchanged ONLY if a resource box pointing to www.MarriedAndHappy.com/Catalog is included with it.

How To Have A Sex-Filled Valentine's Day: Husband Tip #2

Husband, if things are a little tense or unhappy between you and your wife right now... Or, if everything seems to be ok but just not very sexual, then you've still got a few days to turn things around and have yourself a sex-filled Valentines Day. Here's Tip #2...

(Note: Here's Tip #1 if you missed it)

Isn't it just the most wonderful feeling when you walk into a room and some "important" person immediately:

1. Notices you
2. Moves closer to you
3. Wants to hear what you have to say
4. Acts as if you are the most important person in the world

Truth be told, you'd like to experience this a little more often than you do, wouldn't you?

And you know, it's the oddest thing...the more you treat people as though they are important, the more "important" YOU become to them.

Weird, huh?

So, what does this have to do with having a sex-filled Valentine's Day?

A LOT!

Starting tonight, any time you and your wife reunite after having been separated by work or chores, make sure you:

1. Notice her
2. Move closer to her
3. Encourage her to start talking to you
4. Act as if she is the most important person in the world

And you know what? When you pay attention to your wife in this way, it does something inside of her. It starts a warm glow down inside of her.

You know what else? If you keep it up, that warm glow turns into HEAT down in that area where she wears panties.

If you stay handy, you'll be the logical choice to help her quench that "heat".

So tonight, if you get home before your wife does, then wait until she gets home, put down your magazine or newspaper, turn off the TV, get up and do the four steps listed above.

Or, if she's home when you get home, then put your things up and do the four steps.

Or, if you've already missed the evening "reunite" opportunity, then turn off your computer right now, stop reading this, and go do the four steps.

Do this every night from now through Valentine's Day.

Then, after you see how well this works, you may even want to make this a habit that you carry on even after Valentine's day has passed.

Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article as is and unchanged ONLY if a resource box pointing to www.MarriedAndHappy.com/Catalog is included with it.

How To Have A Sex-Filled Valentine's Day: Husband Tip #1

Husband, if things are a little tense or unhappy between you and your wife right now... Or, if everything seems to be ok but just not very sexual, then you've still got a few days to turn things around and have yourself a sex-filled Valentines Day. Here's Tip #1...

Assuming that you are a normal man, you are a natural-born problem solver. You can use this skill to enhance your value and desirability to your wife.

Here's what you do...think about a real problem that your wife has and solve it for her right away. Be THE solution to some problem that your wife has. Whatever the highest-ranking problem is that your wife has represents your OPPORTUNITY for a STEAMY Valentine's Day.

And, here's the key: don't say anything about it, JUST DO IT!

Sound too simple or absurd? Take a closer look...

Before your wife married you, she had a problem...she needed someone with whom she could share a meaningful long-term connection. Sure, she may have dated other men but for whatever reason that connection just wasn't there with those other guys. But, when you came along, there it was – the connection, the chemistry, the appeal.

YOU solved her problem.

If you consider things in a broader context, when you are a solution-oriented person, people want to get closer to you. Often, they'll even pursue after you because you represent greater success and enjoyment to them.

But now, I'm going to guess that it's been a while since you conducted yourself as a solution to the problems that your wife has.

Today, let that change...

What "problems" does your wife have in terms of intimacy, affection, approval, and respect that you could be the "solution" for?

What "problems" does she have around the house such as something that needs to be put together, repaired, or removed that you could be the "solution" for?

What "problems" does she have with someone she knows – someone she cares about that needs something done for them that she's not able to do – but that you could do and thereby be the "solution"?

So, put your mind to these questions and see what you come up with. If nothing comes to mind, then spend the rest of the day carefully listening to everything your wife says and spot yourself one key problem that represents an opportunity for you.

But, there is a catch. You actually have to DO SOMETHING TANGIBLE AND CONCRETE.

You CANNOT do what many men do...and that's just listen to whatever your wife is complaining about and then spew a bunch of verbal advice at her so she can go solve her own problem. That only turns her off towards you because it reveals that you aren't a solution-oriented person – you're just an armchair advisor – and who needs one of those?

Rather, you must filter out all the "chaff" – those things she's just venting about because she enjoys venting about them but they don't really mean anything to her – and extract out those one or two things that really are important to her – AND THEN GO DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO TO SOLVE THAT PROBLEM FOR HER.

And, just so it's clear, the word SOLVE means you COMPLETED whatever it is you're doing for your wife and that you did it in a way that represents the BEST OF YOUR ABILITY. A person who only starts something or who half-way does something is ALWAYS a turn-off.

Then, when she finds out what you've done for her, she's going to take a closer look at you...in a more positive light. It's kind of an odd thing but it's nevertheless true; people are attracted to those who have solved a problem for them.

Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article as is and unchanged ONLY if a resource box pointing to www.MarriedAndHappy.com/Catalog is included with it.

Your Wife Is Set To Cheat On You If You're Making This Mistake...

"Dear Calle,

This past week my wife confessed that she had an affair with a man in a neighboring department where she works. She assures me that the affair is over with, that the whole thing was a mistake, and that I'm the only man she loves. Also, she has asked for my forgiveness with what seems like genuine sincerity and I'm doing my best to forgive her.

What bothers me now is that I know she still runs into this guy at work and I don't know if her feelings for him are truly gone. I guess what I'm saying is I don't know if I can really trust her ever again even though I'm really trying forget this whole thing and put it behind us.

On my part, I acknowledge that I have been withdrawn from my wife for quite some time due to some erection problems I've been having but still, that didn't give her the right to go cheat on me.

Right now, I am just heart-broken and I can't seem to stop crying. Do you have any suggestions for me?

Sincerely,
Mr. A"

Every day of the week, just as described in the letter above, men everywhere find out that their wife has betrayed their trust and had one or more affairs. Sadly, for the vast majority of these men, had they applied even a little "preventative maintenance" to their marriage, they would NOT be dealing with all the unpleasant feelings that go along with betrayal.

In the above letter, the man made a common mistake – a mistake that he could have easily avoided and had he avoided it, he most likely would NOT be dealing with broken-trust and broken-heart issues right now. And, though it's too late for this gentleman, hopefully it's not too late for YOU.

Before I start however, I want to emphasize the fact that in no way am I blaming men for everything nor am I excusing women for cheating. Rather, I want to emphasize a particular kind of "preventative maintenance" that men can employ so they can avoid the scenario where their wife has cheated on them.

The first thing that men must understand is that withholding intimacy and sex from their wife for ANY reason opens the door for infidelity in a hurry. If a man has not been intimate with his wife for an extended period of time – regardless of what the reason – he should know that the gauge that measures whether or not his wife is susceptible to an affair is DEFINITELY in the danger zone.

Now, there are plenty of reasons why a man can lose his sex-drive. There are all kinds of problems that can cause a man to back away from initiating intimacy. There are all sorts of issues that can crop up and drive a wedge between a man and his wife.

Maybe it's a personal health problem such as Erectile Dysfunction. Or, maybe it's a broader-scope problem such as work-related stress. Whatever the reason, whatever the problem, whatever the issue, it's the RESPONSE that men tend to have that I want to deal with here.

Specifically, the response that men USUALLY have when they have a problem or issue is they WITHDRAW.

(Note: At the other end of the spectrum, they go into "Big Baby" mode which is just as bad and is likely to get the same kind of unwanted results from their wife – her having an affair.)

Regardless of what it is, the result is that the more a man withdraws – no matter how legitimate the problem or issue – the greater the emotional distance he creates between he and his wife – the greater the disconnect there is between them and the greater the chances are that his wife will cheat on him.

So, when a man is dealing with a personal problem, he needs to make sure he's doing these things:

1. Communicate frequently with his wife about what he's doing to solve the problem and ask her to be patient with him as he works through it. Make sure that she sees he is taking action to resolve the problem.
2. Take the utmost care that he doesn't push his wife away or pull away from her as he deals with this problem.
3. Regularly make sexually-charged statements to let her know she is still sexually attractive and desirable to him – even though the problem may prevent him from performing at this particular moment in time.
4. Continue to give his wife regular intimacy and sexual release in whatever ways he can – even if it means using his fingers or adult toys.

These are important because the typical man tends to have his head all wrapped up in his problem to the point he ignores his wife. And, while he's ignoring her, his wife wants and needs attention. In fact, she gets very excited and sexual when positive attention is directed at her.

Now, couple this with the fact that when a man withdraws from his wife, she will tend to start feeling unattractive physically, emotionally, and sexually. And, the more a man withdraws, the more pronounced this feeling is in his wife.

Consequently, when some other man comes along and creates those attractive feelings within her, the desire to regain validation becomes so strong that none but the most spiritually devout woman can withstand consummating that validation with sex.

Moreover, as a woman becomes more disconnected from her husband due to his withdrawal, she starts to feel a series of negative feelings ranging from neglected to stress to outright depression. Obviously, these are feelings that she does not like and desperately wants to move away from.

Prior to her own affair, she may also compound the problem by developing other negative feelings such as suspicion – where she starts imagining that her husband is cheating on her and that's why he's not interested in intimacy or in communicating with her. The result is that it's not at all uncommon for a woman to have an affair out of "retaliation" to the affair she imagines her husband to be having.

Bottom line, as much as a man may want to resist it – after all, he does have a problem – but still yet, to focus only on himself and his problems is a sure way to threaten the sanctity of his marriage.

This is true because no matter how much a woman may love her husband, no matter how much she may empathize with his problem, she still has needs.

In straightforward language, a wife needs more than a husband who is wrapped up in himself and his problems is giving her. Consequently, she is "ripe for the picking" to any other man who moves in on her.

Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article as is and unchanged ONLY if a resource box pointing to www.MarriedAndHappy.com/Catalog is included with it.