How To Have A Sex-Filled Valentine's Day: Husband Tip #1
Husband, if things are a little tense or unhappy between you and your wife right now... Or, if everything seems to be ok but just not very sexual, then you've still got a few days to turn things around and have yourself a sex-filled Valentines Day. Here's Tip #1...
Assuming that you are a normal man, you are a natural-born problem solver. You can use this skill to enhance your value and desirability to your wife.
Here's what you do...think about a real problem that your wife has and solve it for her right away. Be THE solution to some problem that your wife has. Whatever the highest-ranking problem is that your wife has represents your OPPORTUNITY for a STEAMY Valentine's Day.
And, here's the key: don't say anything about it, JUST DO IT!
Sound too simple or absurd? Take a closer look...
Before your wife married you, she had a problem...she needed someone with whom she could share a meaningful long-term connection. Sure, she may have dated other men but for whatever reason that connection just wasn't there with those other guys. But, when you came along, there it was – the connection, the chemistry, the appeal.
YOU solved her problem.
If you consider things in a broader context, when you are a solution-oriented person, people want to get closer to you. Often, they'll even pursue after you because you represent greater success and enjoyment to them.
But now, I'm going to guess that it's been a while since you conducted yourself as a solution to the problems that your wife has.
Today, let that change...
What "problems" does your wife have in terms of intimacy, affection, approval, and respect that you could be the "solution" for?
What "problems" does she have around the house such as something that needs to be put together, repaired, or removed that you could be the "solution" for?
What "problems" does she have with someone she knows – someone she cares about that needs something done for them that she's not able to do – but that you could do and thereby be the "solution"?
So, put your mind to these questions and see what you come up with. If nothing comes to mind, then spend the rest of the day carefully listening to everything your wife says and spot yourself one key problem that represents an opportunity for you.
But, there is a catch. You actually have to DO SOMETHING TANGIBLE AND CONCRETE.
You CANNOT do what many men do...and that's just listen to whatever your wife is complaining about and then spew a bunch of verbal advice at her so she can go solve her own problem. That only turns her off towards you because it reveals that you aren't a solution-oriented person – you're just an armchair advisor – and who needs one of those?
Rather, you must filter out all the "chaff" – those things she's just venting about because she enjoys venting about them but they don't really mean anything to her – and extract out those one or two things that really are important to her – AND THEN GO DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO TO SOLVE THAT PROBLEM FOR HER.
And, just so it's clear, the word SOLVE means you COMPLETED whatever it is you're doing for your wife and that you did it in a way that represents the BEST OF YOUR ABILITY. A person who only starts something or who half-way does something is ALWAYS a turn-off.
Then, when she finds out what you've done for her, she's going to take a closer look at you...in a more positive light. It's kind of an odd thing but it's nevertheless true; people are attracted to those who have solved a problem for them.
Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article as is and unchanged ONLY if a resource box pointing to www.MarriedAndHappy.com/Catalog is included with it.
Assuming that you are a normal man, you are a natural-born problem solver. You can use this skill to enhance your value and desirability to your wife.
Here's what you do...think about a real problem that your wife has and solve it for her right away. Be THE solution to some problem that your wife has. Whatever the highest-ranking problem is that your wife has represents your OPPORTUNITY for a STEAMY Valentine's Day.
And, here's the key: don't say anything about it, JUST DO IT!
Sound too simple or absurd? Take a closer look...
Before your wife married you, she had a problem...she needed someone with whom she could share a meaningful long-term connection. Sure, she may have dated other men but for whatever reason that connection just wasn't there with those other guys. But, when you came along, there it was – the connection, the chemistry, the appeal.
YOU solved her problem.
If you consider things in a broader context, when you are a solution-oriented person, people want to get closer to you. Often, they'll even pursue after you because you represent greater success and enjoyment to them.
But now, I'm going to guess that it's been a while since you conducted yourself as a solution to the problems that your wife has.
Today, let that change...
What "problems" does your wife have in terms of intimacy, affection, approval, and respect that you could be the "solution" for?
What "problems" does she have around the house such as something that needs to be put together, repaired, or removed that you could be the "solution" for?
What "problems" does she have with someone she knows – someone she cares about that needs something done for them that she's not able to do – but that you could do and thereby be the "solution"?
So, put your mind to these questions and see what you come up with. If nothing comes to mind, then spend the rest of the day carefully listening to everything your wife says and spot yourself one key problem that represents an opportunity for you.
But, there is a catch. You actually have to DO SOMETHING TANGIBLE AND CONCRETE.
You CANNOT do what many men do...and that's just listen to whatever your wife is complaining about and then spew a bunch of verbal advice at her so she can go solve her own problem. That only turns her off towards you because it reveals that you aren't a solution-oriented person – you're just an armchair advisor – and who needs one of those?
Rather, you must filter out all the "chaff" – those things she's just venting about because she enjoys venting about them but they don't really mean anything to her – and extract out those one or two things that really are important to her – AND THEN GO DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO TO SOLVE THAT PROBLEM FOR HER.
And, just so it's clear, the word SOLVE means you COMPLETED whatever it is you're doing for your wife and that you did it in a way that represents the BEST OF YOUR ABILITY. A person who only starts something or who half-way does something is ALWAYS a turn-off.
Then, when she finds out what you've done for her, she's going to take a closer look at you...in a more positive light. It's kind of an odd thing but it's nevertheless true; people are attracted to those who have solved a problem for them.
Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article as is and unchanged ONLY if a resource box pointing to www.MarriedAndHappy.com/Catalog is included with it.
Labels: AllArticles
posted by Calle Zorro at
12:15 PM
1 Comments:
In addition to the great advice above, I'd add, don't be too generous with your problem-solving. Men and women alike rend to take things that come easy for granted. Think how hard your worked for sex before you got married and compare that to now that you are married.
If you want regular love-making, you'll need to let her realize the the correlation between you making her happy and great sex (ie., her returning the favor).
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