The world over, there are husbands who want to know, “How can I get my wife to be more affectionate and sexual with me?” These husbands really do want their wife to be more affectionate and sexual with them.
But bizarrely, they do not put forth the personal initiative to proactively learn how to get their wife to be more affectionate and sexual with them.
And so, they suffer along in a dissatisfying, frustrating, and miserable marriage relationship wishing their wife would be more affectionate and sexual…but not learning or doing anything to make that a reality.
Now, those husbands who want to continue on wishing, wanting, learning nothing, doing nothing, and doing without affection and sex…well, they can just keep going down their path…it is their choice and their life…and this article is not for them.
But, IF YOU are a husband who wants your wife to be more affectionate and sexual with you, then you first need to understand why a wife becomes non-affectionate and non-sexual towards her husband. Once you understand why your wife is non-affectionate and non-sexual, THEN you will have a better understanding of what you need to learn and do in order to fix the intimacy problems in your marriage relationship.
With that said, a wife becomes non-affectionate and non-sexual towards her husband because of some combination of the following reasons:
- The husband does not understand his wife or her needs…and therefore he is unable to meet or satisfy her needs. (Or, if he does know what his wife’s needs are, he does not bother meeting them for her.)
- The husband operates in a way that turns his wife off and moves her away from him. That is, he thinks, behaves, and relates in a way that is unattractive and turns his wife off towards him.
- The wife has other circumstances in her life that are turning her off…and her husband does not know how to lead her out of her other-generated negativity and turn-off.
- The wife is hurt, angry, or offended over something…and her husband does not know how to lead her out of her self-generated negativity and turn-off.
- The wife was raised up by a male-hating and/or sex-negative mother…and her husband does not know how to lead her out of that conditioning and into her affectionate, intimate, and sexual femininity that underlies her conditioning.
So, IF you are a husband who really wants your wife to be more affectionate and sexual with you, then you must develop yourself into the kind of man where none of the preceding sex-blocking reasons apply to you.
IF you want your wife to be more affectionate and sexual with you, then you must become the kind of man who knows and does the things that open up and turn-on your wife towards you…that cause her to feel attraction, admiration, and desire towards you…that help her out of her stresses, negativity, and shut-down…so that she can be more affectionate and sexual with you.
When you have learned what you need to learn about your wife…and you are consistently doing what you need to do relative to your wife…such that you have eliminated all of the above-listed affection-blocking and sex-blocking reasons, then assuming your wife has any rationality about her at all, she will be more affectionate and sexual towards you.
No normal woman goes into marriage with the desire to be a disconnected and platonic roommate with her husband. But more often than not, a wife will soon enough disconnect from her husband and turn their marriage into a platonic roommate kind of marriage because:
- Her husband does not know or meet her needs.
- Her husband operates in an unattractive manner…her husband makes himself unattractive by his mode of operation…which means he is turning her off, shutting her down, and moving her away from him.
- All the negativity that hits her in the normal course of life…takes her OUT of an affectionate, intimate, and sexual state of mind…and her husband LACKS the knowledge, understanding, insight, and skill to bring her out of her turned-off state of mind…and to bring her into a turned-on state of mind.
The result is marriage relationship that is unpleasant, dissatisfying, miserable, and frustrating for both the husband and the wife.
Now, there is one other reason why a wife will stop being affectionate and sexual towards her husband: She has REAL health problems that are quenching or limiting her ability to be affectionate and/or sexual.
The word “real” was emphasized because a REAL, TRUE health problem is different from a health problem that is manifested due to a wife’s unhappiness in her marriage with her husband. It is different because a health problem that is due to marital unhappiness will go away naturally when a wife once again becomes happy with her husband.
For more on this subject, see this article: What To Do When A Wife’s Health Problems Lower Her Libido?
But, in spite of all the quack diagnoses that are handed out to women…in spite of the multitude of wives who love to use their “diagnosis” as the reason why they cannot be more affectionate and sexual with their husband…the truth remains that the overwhelming majority of wives refuse to be more affectionate and sexual with their husband because he does not know how to relate, interact, or operate in a manner that is attractive, appealing, desirable, or sexy.
Are you really recognizing what I am talking about here?
Because of their male/female ignorance…because of their lack of male/female development…too many husbands are being “set aside” by their wife with nothing more than a quack diagnosis.
Stated differently, too many wives are able to hold their husband at arms length with nothing more than a quack diagnosis that gives the turn-off they feel towards their husband “legitimacy”.
Bluntly, too many husbands are operating in a way that gives their wife the ability to disregard and discard them.
But again, if a husband wants his wife to be more affectionate and sexual with him, then he must develop himself into the kind of man who cannot be disregarded or discarded. He must become a man who is a force that is respected and admired by his wife.
In the same vein, too many husbands are operating in a way that gives their wife all of the power…such that she defines their marriage relationship…she calls the shots…she decides what happens or does not happen…and with all of the JUNK that is LOOPING around in her typical female mind (put their by both her husband and others)…well, their marriage relationship is mostly going to range from dissatisfying at best…to downright awful at worst.
Now, it is possible that your wife is so negative, bitter, offended, irrational, rebellious, hateful, and spiteful…or she is so abused, scarred, and damaged…that she would absolutely refuse to be more affectionate and sexual with you even if you were the world’s most developed and desirable man ever.
Obviously, there is no legal way to make your wife be more affectionate and sexual with you…there is obviously no legal way to force your wife to respond to you affectionately and sexually. But…
YOU CAN become the most attractively-operating, appealing, desirable, and sexy man that your wife knows…and WHEN you become this kind of man…then the odds are extremely high that your wife will WILLINGLY WANT to be more affectionate and sexual with you.
Also, your current wife is the perfect woman for you to practice and develop yourself on. Your current wife KNOWS you better than anyone else. She KNOWS everything about you that is undeveloped and unattractive. And so, WHEN you have learned what you need to learn…and you are doing what you need to do…such that you are able to cause your current wife to be more affectionate and sexual towards you…then you will KNOW that you are the REAL DEAL kind of MAN!
Having said that…if it turns out that you end up in the small percentage of cases where your wife refuses to be more affectionate and sexual with you no matter how much you develop and improve yourself…it is still worth it for you to develop yourself now…because when you are ready to do so, you can move on to your next relationship KNOWING that you have the understanding and the skills to successfully lead a male/female relationship and to keep your next lady turned-on towards you.
Copyright 2018 by Calle Zorro