It’s inevitable; your spouse does something that irritates you. And then, in the UNHEARD space of your mind you gripe and vent to yourself about how much your spouse irritates you or how mad they make you. You may even go so far as to dwell upon thoughts of how much you don’t like them, how much you wish they were just gone.
But, those thoughts are just the start… Now, you really get going… In the UNSEEN recesses of your mind, you start imagining all kinds of sordid ways to “cure” your spouse, to “correct” them, to “fix” them, and especially, to get back at them, to get even with them, to punish them. Before long, if you don’t curb it, you can have a scene going on in your head that far exceeds anything ever seen in a horror movie.
The problem is, your unheard thoughts and unseen imaginations have a very real, very tangible power to them that over time has a major negative impact upon your marriage.
With the thoughts and imaginations of your mind, you are literally cursing your marriage relationship. You’re mentally PROJECTING ill-will, hatred, resentment, bitterness, and strife into your marriage – and every time you do this, it widens the gap between you and your spouse.
And, as you get more and more experienced at having these negative thoughts and imaginations about your spouse, they become more and more powerful – and this stronger energy separates you even further from them.
Now, let me ask you, how much sense does it make to think and imagine even more trouble, distance, and division into your marriage relationship? I think you’ll agree with me that it really doesn’t make much sense at all.
But, if you have the power to do it “wrong”, then you must necessarily also have the power to do it “right”.
The “right” way is to use your mind to think, to imagine, to project goodwill, lovingness, supportiveness, and appreciation for your spouse.
ESPECIALLY, when you’re mad at your spouse…that’s when above all times you want to DEMAND of yourself that you channel and control your thoughts and imaginations in the positive direction.
This can be a real test of one’s will-power. For most people, it really “rubs against their grain” to even consider the notion of not giving into negative thoughts, imaginations and emotions when their spouse does something that displeases them.
But when you do, you unleash one of the most powerful forces available to you…the power of NON-RESISTANCE.
Water serves as a wonderful example. You can “hit” water as hard as you want – and you can’t hurt it. You can put water into any shape or form and it molds itself to the form unharmed. It’s non-resistant. And yet, if you “resist” that water in certain ways, it’s powerful enough to cut you into pieces, to crush you, to totally destroy you.
It’s the same in your marriage, when you let those irritating things that inevitably crop up in a marriage “flow on by like water” without any resistance, they have no energy with which they can harm you. Conversely, the more you resist them, the more powerful they become – even to the point of destroying your marriage.
And, you let them “flow on by” by focusing your mind upon the outcome and the results that you want in your marriage. If your spouse has done something hurtful, focus your mind upon thoughts and imaginations of them being a loving, caring, non-hurtful person. Create a scene in your mind of them being a person that really meets your needs and pleases you in every way.
In doing so, you mentally project blessings into your marriage. And as before, those unseen, unheard thoughts and imaginations have a very real, a very tangible power that will soon enough be seen and heard in the physical realm of your marriage.
Give this a try for yourself. Try it out the next time you’re offended at your spouse and prove to yourself that your persistently loving and non-resistant mind directed at your spouse will smooth out whatever the trouble is in a way faster, more peaceful, more harmonious way than the negative, resistance approach ever has.
Copyright 2008 by Calle Zorro