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The #1 Reason So Many Women Avoid Intimacy With Their Man

A normal woman LOVES intimacy. It's what she daydreams about. It's what her fantasies are filled with. It's what she wants all the time.

If that's true, why then do so many women avoid, withdraw from, and resist intimacy?

Actually, normal women – women who are emotionally, intellectually, physically, and spiritually healthy – do NOT avoid, withdraw from, or resist intimacy.

They do however, MOVE AWAY from the feeling of being USED.

Women DO withdraw from being an ACCESSORY that's "pulled out" and "used" on an "as-needed" basis.

Women DO resist a man who ignores her and pays no attention to her until he wants something from her.

Bluntly, women avoid being a meaningless, valueless "masturbation hole".

Imagine, if your wife completely ignored you EXCEPT for when she wanted you to pull out your wallet and give her money.

It would quickly become would quickly see the link...the connection...when she's nice, when she pays attention to me, she wants money.

You'd soon realize that your wife didn't actually love, respect, appreciate, or admire you, she merely had a need for money from time to time.

How would that make you feel?

Not very good, right?

Well, now you understand how many women feel. They long ago made the connection that when their husband pays attention to them and is nice to them, he wants sex.

They long ago realized that their husband was NOT coming on to them because he actually loved her, found her beautiful, cared about her, admired her, or cherished her.

Rather, he was responding and reacting to a physical, genetic urge – much like people are physically made to seek out a drink of water when they get thirsty.

That's why so many men get a "No thanks, not interested" response from their woman. After all, who wants to be the equivalent of a meaningless, generic glass of water with no purpose or value other than to quench HIS physical thirst?

So, what's the solution?

It's not hard...

At the most basic level, intimacy that starts in a NON-sexual setting...intimacy that causes a woman to feel meaningful, valuable, pretty, attractive, special, and wanted...on a regular, on-going basis...that leads to a deep connection...a valuable relationship of mutual worth...and amazing THAT is intimacy that a reasonable, rational woman IS interested in.

So, frequently flirt with your woman in a non-sexual setting. With persistent application, you'll find your flirting generally causes her to feel attractive which triggers within her a desire for intimacy.

Copyright 2009, Article by Calle Zorro. Permission is granted to reprint this article as is and unchanged ONLY if a resource box pointing to is included with it.



Blogger Sarah said...

Interesting Article. I think it's true in many respects.

May 29, 2009 2:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don' t think that women are so superficial that if her husband "flirts" with her more often so she feels " pretty" she desire more intimacy. I think he's on the right track that it has to do with feeling more cherished, but flirting is directly related to sex. Here are some ideas: take your wife out on a date more than once a year in your anniversary, help out around the house without being asked, call her during the day just to tell her you love her and you're thinking about her, buy her a gift for no reason at all, treat her like you did when you were wooing her, don't just sit on the couch or at the computer all night ignoring her and then have the nerve to call her frigid.

May 29, 2009 3:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You did very well at at choosing words that communicate this damaging dynamic in marriage.

A lot of coaches tell guys to be romantic and she will repay you with sex. When it doesn't happen the guys get mad.

Like you said, the lady knows when it is nothing more than a come on to get what he wants.

The money trade was a good example... Though I guess some people would be happy to make that trade. There is a whole industry built around it.

Honestly guys: Money, romance... none of it is going to by you loving at home. Your wife is not the corner hooker. To even suggest it should work, is an insult.

Give her a part of yourself consistently. Build a relationship on openness, respect, honesty, and admiration. Be these things to yourself first, then to her.

There is nothing as romantic and sexy as a guy who has self respect and respects others, honest with himself and her, and shows appreciation for what he has, including her.

May 29, 2009 3:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OK, so what is a husband to do when he takes his wife out to dinner three nights a week (without the kids), helps with the laundry, does the dishes, works 50 hours week, provides a great home and a nice lifestyle, helps the kids with their homework, listens, encourages her and no matter what I do - this is what I get:

No kissing, No intimacy, No effort on her side whatsoever. In fact, she goes out of her way to avoid sleeping with me, has all the time in the world for the kids, her friends, the cats, but for the husband who is just a big ATM machine - I get or hear, stomach aches, headaches and just plane tired. Well if you go to bed at 2 a.m. every night, your bound to be tired. Oh and before you think "This guy must be fat" LOL I am in great shape, compete in tri's and work out five days a week.

Sorry for the vent -but I feel better.

July 6, 2009 3:46 AM  
Blogger Calle Zorro said...

To the previous guy who is being Mr. Mom, and still isn't getting a sexual response...

It's time for you to MAN up. You're trying to be a woman. Unless your wife is a lesbian, she isn't interested in a man who's trying to be a woman.

She's not interested in a guy who's trying to do all of this stuff JUST SO HE CAN GET IN HER PANTIES.

If you're a man who's in a situation like the previous commenter described his to be then DIVE for this site:

You'll find out how to put an end to your woman's non-sexual responses and behaviors.

July 17, 2009 9:48 AM  

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