Welcome Fellow Man, If you've been married for any length of time, I expect you'll agree that there's more to a marriage than just sex...and yet, if a man and woman can get the sex part working right, everything else just seems to come together so much easier. Wouldn't you agree? On the flip side, there can be so many things right in a marriage (or long-term relationship) but if the sex is missing or if the sex is unfulfilling, everything else just doesn't seem to work very well -- making it even harder to enjoy those things that are right. You've probably found that to be the case too, right?
And typically, a man's interest and desire for sex is able to persist through all the ups and downs, ins and outs of life and marriage. Unfortunately, this is rarely the case for a woman. Because of this, a woman is most sexual when she has a man who can lead, guide, and channel her in such a way that she retains her interest in and desire for sex. Having established this foundation, begin to focus your awareness on the fact that there are two components -- or variables if you will -- that a man must manage in order to help his lady retain her interest in and desire for sex...
Both of these needs are similar in that they directly impact a woman's interest in and desire for sex. The difference is in where the need originates. The emotional element is a series of causes and effects that originate within the woman. The psychological element is a series of causes and effects that originate with the man. In other words, when a man is managing a woman's emotional needs, he's mostly helping her manage HERSELF so that her sexual energy is not squashed or destroyed by negative emotions. But, when he's managing a woman's psychological needs, he's mostly managing HIMSELF so that he triggers a sexual response in his wife towards him.
Probably, there's not a man alive who doesn't realize and understand that women are more emotionally driven than are men. But, what does that really mean? It means that a woman has a tendency to have wide swings -- both up and down -- sometimes very quickly -- in what she FEELS and EXPERIENCES -- depending upon what happens to be "crossing her path" at both an external and internal level at any given moment. At it's extreme, a woman can experience joy, sorrow, fear, hate, depression, excitement, love, happiness, or any number of other emotions in a very short period of time. The problem is, us humans tend to focus on and pay attention to NEGATIVE emotions much more frequently and strongly than we do POSITIVE emotions. And here's the problem with that... By definition, an emotion is a "strong feeling". As such, an emotion will have a PHYSIOLOGICAL IMPACT on any human being -- male or female. But, as it pertains to a woman, the "physiological impact" of negative emotions is to dampen or shut down her interest in and desire for sex. And that my fellow man, is NOT what you want. Let me give you an all too common example... A woman cannot and will not be attracted to or sexual with a man who goes to work, comes home, plops down on the couch with a beer in one hand, a remote in the other and glues himself to the TV – all while totally ignoring her and the children. Such a man can want sex till his last day on this earth and he’s not going to get it -- or if he does, it’ll be such a lousy experience that it’ll be worse than if he hadn’t of got it. Why? It's because not only has he NOT helped her manage her emotions, he has also TRIGGERED negative emotions in her. And again, her physiological response is to lose her interest in and desire for sex. Now, this raises some key questions that are probably already going through your mind:
Probably, you've already discovered that when
it comes to questions like these, it's nearly impossible to get a
meaningful answer from your wife. And yet, it's impossible to
have an enjoyable and fulfilling marriage until you do get the
answers. Now, once you’re meeting your woman’s emotional needs -- and based on how she's wired -- that has to come first, then the other variable comes into play -- meeting her psychological needs. As was stated previously, this mostly has to do with the man -- YOU! The kind of man that you are, the way you think, and how you carry yourself all affect your lady's mind in terms of her mental states and thinking processes. In other words, your level of MASCULINITY functions to either increase or decrease your woman's awareness of, interest in, and motivation towards sex. Think of it like this... Your level of MALENESS fires up or shuts down those sexual parts of her brain and body. That's why this is a psychological need. Consider what happens in far too many marriages: a guy and a girl are attracted to each other. They get married and she goes to work “domesticating” him. He "let’s" her do it...because he wants to be a good husband...except now,
A man must fully realize that it’s impossible for a woman to be attracted to or sexual with him -- if he's this kind of man. Here's another way to look at this...a wife cannot be attracted to a husband who allows his wife to bridle and harness him to the wagon of her whims, wishes, fits, tantrums, or orders. The sad truth is that if a man is not purposely and purposefully managing his wife's psychological needs then his wife:
How so? As a man goes through the growing process of becoming MORE of a MAN, he teaches both himself and his wife to:
Of course, a blooming, blossoming, wonderful marriage is not all up to the husband. The wife is most definitely an equally key player in the marriage. However, experience shows that a wife is best able to "play" her part AFTER the man takes a leadership role in the relationship. When the man takes the lead in being what he is supposed to be in the marriage, it CLEARS the way for the woman to be what she is supposed to be in the marriage. Fellows, that's how it works -- with very few exceptions.
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To learn more about the newsletter, click here: FREE Men's Interest Newsletter Next, you can browse through the dozens of Free Marriage Relationship Articles listed alphabetically by title...or browse randomly by going directly to the Marriage Relationship Blog. After that, you can get involved in the Married And Happy Discussion Forum. Also, you may also be interested in the Frequently Asked Questions. If you have something you'd like to tell me, I'd love to hear from you. Feel free to use the form below to send me a message. Or, you can even make a product or service recommendation. Lastly, you can browse through the Marriage Relationship Catalog and get the resources that will help you invoke a greater desire in your wife for sex with you. Dedicated to helping you create a happier, more sexual marriage, |