Married And Happy Discussion Forum

Note: if you're not of a Christian persuasion, you should probably skip this post.

A newsletter subscriber asked me the following question:

Quote:Here's my question - if I put God in the center of my life, I'll be able to lean on Him when it's the worst. Great for me, and the way it should be - right? Will my wife think that Jesus is my new hobby (I.e. more important than her)? I know He is supposed to be more important than her, but is that what she really wants - without knowing it?

Here was my answer to him...

As a man begins to fully surrender to God, he will begin to do what he believes is right between he and God...he will begin to have "values" that he stands for no matter what others do or think...he will begin to seek to please God only and just love people...and by doing this, he begins to project a level of masculinity, strength, courage, and autonomy that a woman is attracted to. Plus, as he experiences God's goodness in his life, he recognizes the importance of augmenting good in other people's lives...especially those of his wife and children. In other words, just as God is good to a man who will surrender to Him, a surrendered man wants to share good in the lives of those around him. Just as God does not ignore a man who is in right relationship with Him, a man does not ignore his wife or family...rather as a man enhances his relationship with God, he just naturally seeks to enhance his relationship with his wife and children.

So, when you begin to follow God as defined in the Bible, you will become a GOOD MAN...one that your woman is attracted to and willingly surrenders to...because you are a MAN that it's SAFE for her to surrender to (as opposed to a self-seeking, self-serving guy that it's not safe to surrender to).

Just make sure it's God that you are surrendering to because when you seek to please a religion/denomination (as opposed to God), the focus shifts from pleasing God to pleasing people...the focus shifts from love and life more abundantly to faults and failures...the focus shifts from mercy and grace to condemnation, judgment, and criticism.

Bottom line, if God is truly the center of your life, not only will your life get better, but you'll proactively seek to make the lives of those around you better too...and your wife will see that your relationship with Christ is a GOOD thing for you AND her AND the children.

Its been my experience that if a guy is truly secure in his beliefs then he won't have to shout them out & push them down peoples throats. That just shows a lack of security and strength. Truth is that person is NOT strong and secure in his values and beliefs but is full of fear that other people's differing beliefs might trump his. He feels threatened by someone elses beliefs because he's not secure in his own. But if his beliefs and values really are TRUE then what does he have to be afraid of? In the end he knows the truth will prevail. And when we die we will all find out what the truth is one way or the other. Calle had someone ask him a question so he answered it. If a person wants to hear what you have to say they will ask as prompted by seeing something they find attractive about your life and the way you live. Its always actions before words. Let someone be attracted to you by what you DO and how successful your life is and THEN they may ask for your opinion and it can be confidently shared. Judge a tree by its fruit. Faith without works is dead. That's why I'm here, I want what Calle has. He's definitely doing something right and therefore his opinion carries a LOT of weight. That's why people pay to read his books and hear what he has to say. And its saving my marriage. So I say, Thank God 4 Zorroism.