03-19-2009, 10:52 AM
03-19-2009, 06:32 PM
Here's a biggie...
Learn to be more direct with your man.
Women tend to communicate in a coy, indirect language of hints. It's generally the case that when a woman asks a question, she's really making a statement. And, when she makes a statement, she's really asking a question...she's asking her man to get involved in a discusssion with her.
Now, for those men who have made it their business to study how women operate so that they can be more successful with them, you can use the famale form of communication and they'll know how to make the appopriate translations and conversions and everything will generally work out ok.
But, for the rest of the men in the universe, they'll be oblivious to what you're really communicating to them. They'll simply process what you say in their straightfoward and direct manner -- and the result is that you're left feeling DISsatisfied.
So, when you ask a man a question like, "Do you feel like everything's ok in our marriage?" he'll mentally scan through a list of things that are important to him and if those things are mostly being taken care of, he'll respond with something like, "It's fine!" and move on to whatever he's doing.
He'll NEVER get the fact that you were telling him there are some things you are unhappy with in the marriage!
In his way of processing the world, you asked him a direct question and he gave you a direct answer.
The result? You're unhappy and dissatisfied...and probably offended because he just moved on to something else. Well, in his defense, you asked if everything was ok, he felt like it was, and so there was nothing else to discuss.
Now, someone has to take the first step and in this case, it looks like it gets to be you...
I suggest you do two things:
1. Start being way more direct. If something's not ok for you, let your man know. Of course, you have to present things to a man in a certain way or you'll just turn him off and turn him away. But, if you are warm, loving, sweet, firm, and direct, then everything should be ok.
2. Begin to give your husband an education in how women communicate. Women understand what other women are saying, right? Use examples from things other women have said and translate and explain them to your husband. It won't take long and he'll get the hang of it. For example, if you have a daughter, pay attention to the things she says...things that you know what she means and understand what she's really saying...and at the appropriate, private time, explain to your husband what your daughter was really saying. If you don't have a daughter, TV can provide you with plenty of examples. Just don't try to teach him while he's in the middle of the show.
Learn to be more direct with your man.
Women tend to communicate in a coy, indirect language of hints. It's generally the case that when a woman asks a question, she's really making a statement. And, when she makes a statement, she's really asking a question...she's asking her man to get involved in a discusssion with her.
Now, for those men who have made it their business to study how women operate so that they can be more successful with them, you can use the famale form of communication and they'll know how to make the appopriate translations and conversions and everything will generally work out ok.
But, for the rest of the men in the universe, they'll be oblivious to what you're really communicating to them. They'll simply process what you say in their straightfoward and direct manner -- and the result is that you're left feeling DISsatisfied.
So, when you ask a man a question like, "Do you feel like everything's ok in our marriage?" he'll mentally scan through a list of things that are important to him and if those things are mostly being taken care of, he'll respond with something like, "It's fine!" and move on to whatever he's doing.
He'll NEVER get the fact that you were telling him there are some things you are unhappy with in the marriage!
In his way of processing the world, you asked him a direct question and he gave you a direct answer.
The result? You're unhappy and dissatisfied...and probably offended because he just moved on to something else. Well, in his defense, you asked if everything was ok, he felt like it was, and so there was nothing else to discuss.
Now, someone has to take the first step and in this case, it looks like it gets to be you...
I suggest you do two things:
1. Start being way more direct. If something's not ok for you, let your man know. Of course, you have to present things to a man in a certain way or you'll just turn him off and turn him away. But, if you are warm, loving, sweet, firm, and direct, then everything should be ok.
2. Begin to give your husband an education in how women communicate. Women understand what other women are saying, right? Use examples from things other women have said and translate and explain them to your husband. It won't take long and he'll get the hang of it. For example, if you have a daughter, pay attention to the things she says...things that you know what she means and understand what she's really saying...and at the appropriate, private time, explain to your husband what your daughter was really saying. If you don't have a daughter, TV can provide you with plenty of examples. Just don't try to teach him while he's in the middle of the show.
01-10-2012, 03:43 AM
(03-19-2009 10:52 AM)MailLady Wrote: [ -> ]What are the 2 - 3 most important things a woman can do to make the relationship with her husband more satisfying?
Hi there ,
1- listen to him and pay attention and respect when he talks to you , your children , friends , other people - RESPECT -
2- give him sex , a lot of sex , loving caring tender sex and sometimes rough too . Talk to him about sex. - SEX -
3- plan things together and have common aims - COMPANION -
Vic.